Thursday, July 25, 2019

Forgetfulness



While  ago  after  morning  recitation   in  our  veranda  when   i  went   to   my  kitchen  i  forgot  why   i  came   here .

But  within   a  moment   i  remembered  it  back.   I   went  there    to   pick  up    pan  of  milk   so  i  can   store   it  in  fridge  before  sitting    with  laptop .


I   spent   my   childhood  and  early  youth  in  village. My   mom   lived  almost  75   years   but  i   hardly   remember   if  she  would  forgot  anything  except  her  eyeglasses  sometimes . She   had   excellent  memory  otherwise .

She  would   tell  immediately  whether   it  was  date  or  event   from   both   recent   past  or  long  ago   past.

Same   was   my  father .I  never  saw  him  forgetting  anything   except   mom's  important  stuff   she  would  ask  to  bring  on   return . But  it  was  mostly  intentionally   i  guess . So  he  can   have  mom's  attention.

Elderly  people  in  my  village  men  or   women  were  never  detected   by  dementia  ever . None  of  them  was  of  more  than  100  years  though.

Whenever  they  would  meet  while  walking  in  streets  they   would   answer  my   greetings    with  smile  and  greet   by  mentioning  my  name.

So  back  there  i  had  no  idea   that  when  people  get  old    they   started  to  forget  stuff  . Specially   i  was  not  aware  that    dementia    was   serious   disease.

After   marriage   i  was   normal   for  many  years.   Things   suddenly   change  after   deaths   of  my  parents   in  2011  and  12
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My   periods  disturbed  badly  and  then  disappeared  even  when  i  was  in  early  forties. Hair  fall   began    swiftly   and  i  thought   i  will   be  bald  soon.

My   left   eye   seemed   to  loose     it's   sight.  And    along   this  started  the  forgetfulness . 

It    started    slowly    that   i   would  forgot   things   i  had  put  somewhere   to  keep  safe  until  needed.

Or   dates   and   names   during   discussions .But   it   grew   smoothly   by  the  time . I  would   forgot  often    and   it  would   be  annoying   for  hubby   or  kids.

In   beginning   when  i  started  to  forgot  hubby  and  my  sons  would    found  it   amusing   and would  laugh. 


                                            pinterest.com 

Specially  when  i  would   say  wrong   name  or  mention  wrong  date  or  presence  of  people  somewhere  in  any  event  my  family   would   laugh.

In   starting    i   took  it  "not big  deal" except  my   forgetfulness   was  way  to    amusement  of  my  family .

My   younger   son   would  say   " if  someone  in  world  want  his  thing  keep  in  secret   ,hand it  to  my  mom and   no  one   will  find  it   again"

My   husband   had  one   advantage   of  my  forgetfulness   though. In   morning     we  would   argue  bit  about   something   tiny     and   in  afternoon   i  would  forget  that   i  was  annoyed  to  him. 

He  would  come ,  give  greeting  hug  and  chat    with   mischievous   smile . My  younger   son  would   remind   just  to   make  all  laugh  " Oh  mom  you   are  talking  to  papa  ,you  forgot   you   were  angry  with  him  because  he  switched  the  channel  to  news "

I   would   feel  embarrassment   and  try   to  recharge    anger  by   protesting   look   but   hubby   would  burst   with  laughter   and  say   " no  use  of  fake  anger  ,you  talked  to  me  already"

Now  that  was  serious   matter  :(.

Within   few   years   things  got  little   critical  because  of  my  forgetfulness. Time   for   avoiding  and  laughing  was  gone   for  me  and  for  all.

We    had  to  change  the  locks   of  doors   few  times  because  i  forgot  the  keys  inside. Many   times   i  had   put  t.v  remote  in  fridge .Sometimes  cell  phone  in  cupboard  or  fridge .   Receipts  and  papers  urgently  needed   went  misplaced  for  many  times .

Because  i  had  no  idea   that  it  was  a  disease,  we  never  went   to  any  doctor. I   had  never  read  about   problem  nor  in  my  favorite  and  useful     t.v  shows   i  watched  something  related.

All   i  could  do  was  worrying   about   problem   which  made  it  quicker  and  deeper.

 One   day   i  watched   a  movie   in  which  in  one  scene   a  mother    put  her   baby   in  bath  tub   and    forgot   to  pick   him   up  because   she  had  mental   disorder  and   forget   suddenly  all  present  situation  she  is  in,   and  step  into  totally  new   sequence  of  thought.

It   was  horrifying .  It  made  me  cry  like  hell. After   a  good  long   cry   when  i  felt  light     there  was only    one  thing  in   my  mind.

 Brain   is   main    thing  . It  is   to  control   and  function  in  human   body . Computer  is   mere  a  copy   of  our  brain  but   can  perform   far   better  than  it , why ?.

 Because   it  has   no   EMOTIONS    which  can   slow   or  weaken   it's  actions.

I   started   to  contemplated  on    my    problem  carefully . I  realized  that    i    forget   stuff    when   i   speak   thoughtlessly   and   spontaneously .

I   began   to   be  careful of  what  i  spoke. I  felt   as  i  was  trying  to  push   away  the  fog  that   had  surround  my  nerves   inside  my  head   and  was  blocking   it's  natural   messaging   system. 

Meanwhile  i   faced   another   weird   problem. During    watching   t.v  or  chat   i  would   suddenly  ,spontaneously   say   something  that    was  accurate  and  correct   but    Interesting   about  it  was  that  i  had  no  idea  from  where  that   came  from ? I  was  unable  to  learn   the  way  it  processed  itself  in  my  thoughts . 

It  seemed   that  such   incidents   were   result  of   BROKEN  MESSAGES  OF  NERVOUS  SYSTEM .

I   worked  harder   on  my  FOCUS.  I  found    that   only  solution   is  to  this  problem    that   i  can  provide  is  

BEING  ATTEND  ALL  THE  TIME .  KEEPING   MIND  PRESENT. nothing   else   was  there  that  i  could  do .

So  i  restarted  my  yoga  which  helped   to  COMPOSE  PHYSICAL  ENERGY   AND  HARMONIZE   IT  WITH     MENTAL    ENERGY. 

It   makes   focus   strong   and   procedure   of  thinking   precise.

I   made   it  possible   that   my  mind  is  equally  present   where   my  body  is. I  made  sure that  i   will  watch   words  that  come  out  of  my  mouth .

 I quit   living   in  painful  memories   risen    by   my   parents     demise.

It   took  long  tiring   effort   and    time.  Since  almost    two  years   i   am   feeling   better.

I  hardly    forget   anything   and  if  i  do   it  comes back   in  my  mind   within   second  when  i  try  to  remember  it. You  can  imagine  my   joy  and  gratitude .

My  faith   in  my  lord  has  become  more  deep  and  strong.

Whenever  i   asked  him  to   help  and  show  the  way, he  did  miracle   in  my  life. If  my  call  for  him  was   true .His  answers   were  also   immediate   and  fulfilling.












34 comments:

  1. So sorry to hear about this issue. I am so glad to hear that you have improved. The brain is so complex and our minds seem like such an enigma.

    Take care and be well!

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    1. You are right about brain'complexity dear Brain

      But if we from the beginning learn to use it properly things can be bit simple

      Delete
  2. This is a fantastic post, dearest Baili!!
    I suffer from exactly the same problem with forgetfulness...and after reading this wonderfully informative post, I'm beginning to think mine, too, could well be down to being too stressed and preoccupied with worries.
    I will try to do as you did, and learn to relax and focus on each moment.
    Oh thank you so, so, much for this... I'm certain that it will help so many people!😊😊

    Have a wonderful day, my beautiful friend!

    Much love and hugs ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

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    1. Thank you sooo dear Ygraine for SWEET words :)

      I believe that once you have sorted out the problem, specially it's origin and determined to solve it
      You will be surly blessed with the solution

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  3. Thanks for sharing about your issue, what an honest post!It must be really difficult. I hope it will get better and better☺

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  4. Baili I'm so happy to read this post. How scary what you went through. I have some times when I'm completely forgetful and I find it embarrassing, but Alex understands that it happens and he's supportive so I am getting used to it. You've inspired me because honestly I'm having some health issues, nothing major, it's just a sciatic nerve that causes lots of leg pain for me and I've been on the fence about doing something drastic about it. I'm starting a big exercise program next week, including yoga too. I find that when I made time for yoga, it strengthened all of my senses, including my memory and helped my chronic pain a LOT. Thanks for mentioning that it took you about 2 years to start feeling better...it's a long road but it's always worth it! xxxx

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    1. Our body responses accordingly to messages sent by our brain dear Rain but it is also true that so many health issues that appear only to women because their emotional side is far strong than men which means their make brain present problem far bigger than it Actually is

      I am so happy for you my friend and I believe that yoga will definitely resolve more of your issues

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  5. Sorry to hear you have had problems with forgetting, but I'm glad you found some methods to help lessen the problem.

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  6. The word you used is focus. I wonder if perhaps you were juggling too many thoughts in your mind. Your mind rebelled by kicking some thoughts out. I have known people with dementia and related afflictions. They usually lose the ability for normal functions. It can happen gradually or quickly. You are right to work at keeping yourself alert no matter what the reason. And I am so happy you don't have dementia.

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    1. you are right dear Emma

      i was sunken in emotions until i realized that i have to rise and recreate my vision towards positive routine of life

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  7. Many thanks for sharing this.
    I am so pleased that over time you have been able to improve things.
    I do think relaxation, perhaps yoga or practising meditation can help with certain health issues.

    All the best Jan

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    1. Meditations are huge help for such issues ,well said dear Jan

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  8. I'm glad you are getting better. I also forget things. I think that sometimes it's because I was not paying attention. I should pay attention to the here and now instead of being lost in my thoughts.
    My wife also forgets sometimes. We joke about gremlins hiding things on us.

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    1. haha

      i ether became superstitious for while in starting dear John

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  9. Glad to hear of the improvement, Baili.

    I wasn't Sleeping well and it affected my memory. With improved sleep patterns, my memory has improved.

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    1. taking proper sleep helps brain to function well indeed

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  10. Vicious circle, baili.
    We all forget things specially as we age.
    But if you star to worry too much about it your nervous system takes control and it gets even worse.
    Take it slowly and naturally.
    Have a great weekend.

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    1. so true , having patience with problems of aging and trying best to deal with them calmly is required in this part of age

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  11. Yes, Baili, forgetfulness and loss of concentration can be two problems that many of us face from time to time. The same has happened to me and your comments about talking slower and concentrating are well taken. Also exercising both the body and mind I believe is another big factor. It's why I enjoy going to the gym, walking, reading and listening to podcasts. Unfortunately, my mind has a terrible habit of wandering off subject at the most unlikely times. Thank you for sharing your experiences in a very honest and heartfelt way, as always. Posts like these demonstrate that we all share some common ailments and fears. It's how we face them that matters most.
    Also, thank you, Baili for the very kind words about a recent post with some family photos.

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    1. You have some very brilliant hobbies to slow down the process bit dear Dorothy

      I agree we all face such complications at certain parts of our life

      WHAT MATTERS MOST IS HOW WE DEAL WITH THEM :)

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  12. Glad you're feeling better. I heard that with menopause some women became quite forgetful but it improves a bit after a few years. Take care!!

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    1. Oh I was not aware of this dear Angela

      May be menopause declares the certain period of life for women which can drive them into thick forest of so many tangled thoughts

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  13. Seeing a way to work your way out of that cavern must be such a relief.

    With migraines, I have "word days" when I know the word I want, can see it in my mind, but can't pull it out.

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    1. Migraines are horrible dear Susan

      I had migraine for almost two years when I was 17
      Mom would make homemhomemade medicine including almond and some other same nuts and herbs but nothing worked
      It left before I got 20 I think

      During pain it was hard to open eyes or pick head up from pillow

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  14. Good one.
    The trick is to keep the brain active continuously. See my second last post where a lady is still painting (and earning) at 99 !!

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  15. A very moving post, but full of hope and good advice.
    And I apologize for laughing at your youngest son's comment. I won't tell my daughter what he said so she cannot use the same comment against me :)

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    1. children don't realize the seriousness of our problem dear Chris :)

      and this is why they easily make fun of them until age and time shows them how sensitive situation was

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  16. I'm so glad you found a way to recuperate from your memory loss, baili. It must have been very frightening for you. It was perceptive of you to realize that you needed to stop living in your memories and move ahead into the present. Probably it was hard to do at first, but changing old habits usually is. And it was worth it.

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    1. when i first realized that i am dwelling too much in past i decided to break my routine dear Jenny , i started job which made me feel much better slowly, i gained my coincidence to think better

      i could do it because i wanted to and without grace of lord nothing was possible

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  17. Hi Baili, sometimes we forget something. It's very common, even more when we worry, anxiety, or grief.
    To keep our brain fit, we have to use it. I am practicing a theory "use it or lose it"

    Have a wonderful weekend, Baili :)

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  18. amazingly said dear Evi :)))

    practice makes difference indeed

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  19. Worry, anxiety, stress all affect our memory. Mindful focus helps as does good diet, exercise (walking is excellent) and drinking lots of (enough) water.

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  20. I admire how you tackled your forgetfulness, Baili, and I'm happy that you have experienced such success. We all forget things more and more as we get older. Women going through menopause sometimes experience memory issues, but they usually improves afterwards. I was smiling when I read your post, because I often misplace things or forget why I walked into a room. I once found my deodorant in the fridge. My problem is that my mind is always racing ahead to the next thing, and I am not focusing or being present in what I am doing. Your post gives me HOPE!!! Thank you my friend!

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