Wednesday, May 15, 2024

Laptop Disorder And Nerve Pain (most probably)

 

Hey  Lovely people !

Hope and pray all is well at your part of the world !

Our temperature has reached to 40 plus but rains in northern part are making our weather bearable until now fortunately !

May the ease be for all of you as well! 

Our younger son has come from Karachi to spend two weeks and few days with us which makes us so happy and grateful .We thought he would spend whole two months holidays with us actually but he wanted to go back and redo one of his exam to improve performance. He also wants to do internship to have some early experience. We have to agree with him with heart full of prayers. His decision makes us both happy and little sad but we don't have habit to make children follow our wishes and give up their own . We know that with time we will learn to accept the fact that they are grown ups now and according to law of the Nature they had to fly to explore, to learn  and to grow for the better (hopefully).

The lap top of my younger son went off right before his exams of forth semester . He had to stay in university until 8pm when university is closed. Sometimes he would go to stay with one of his friend so he can work on his laptop once laptop is free as his friend  also had to prepare for the exams as well. 

He says it was quite tough preparing for exams without laptop but he tried his best and hopes for good for the result. We are proud of him he  managed to give exams despite he had no laptop to work on! His laptop is Asus and his elder brother has gifted him before he joined university . My son has shown many big shops but no one has succeeded until now .Lets hope someone can fix it soon !

Last week i went to attend an event at hubby's niece house. She had renovated her house and wanted to share her joy with family and friends so she help a Quran khawani event ,an event in which people come and recite  holy book in order to show gratitude for the completion of the work successfully . I ate really small  portion of the rice there. It was mutton biryani actually. I ate like hardly two table spoon .On next day i realized that my knee is aching badly and swelling has risen but what surprisingly the pain was in left knee instead of right today. I massaged it with voltral but pain intensified instead. Yesterday i went to homeopathic doctor and he gave me one bottle of drops which i have add in water and take after each hour. Secondly he gave me tablets for ten days.

I chose Homeopathic treatment because allopathic medicine show sever side affects now. I am feeling little better but it is just second day. Doctor said the your body has gastric issue and this medicine will help to extract gas absorbed in your nerves . That was in my mind already . I have been linking knee pain to weakness of joint first for decade then to uric acid but now it seems different because how can pain shifts from one place to another if it is stick to some certain part of body such as knee joints ? 

Do any of you have similar experience that pain shifts and moves when eat something forbidden  like rice or lentil . I ate that tiny portion of rice after more than two years and result surprised me sadly. 

Thanks for bearing with me friends ! 

i will be visiting you all asap .

health ,peace and happiness to you a nd to all you love! 


Thursday, May 9, 2024

The Odds Of Cousins Part Two

 

I have had many male and female cousins in my native town . Most of them were friendly,  few of them( females only)  were fast friends. 

My mother had three elder (step by father side)  brothers and one younger brother and one sister . In my prior to two previous posts  The Odds Of Cousins i mentioned how the only son of my aunt kept troubling me from childhood to till my late teens.

Today's post is about another cousin who never  bother me directly though created issues in my life indirectly. He was the eldest son of my uncle (mom's elder step brother). His name was Liaquat .Sorry i forgot to mention name of cousin i mentioned in prior to two previous posts His name was Farid .

Liaquat had many family issues due to his mostly quarrelsome  parents. My uncle was considered rich man as he had two transport trucks running in Rawalpindi city. He also had many pieces of lands within and around the village including farms. He never took part in ploughing personally but had workmen to do it for him. He  would like to spend his days with friends leisurely at home in men's room or at hotels . I learned from mom that his wife belonged to another city and could never adjust with her in laws. She was pretty woman with golden color and sharp features. She was smart and active . Her cooking was popular in family members. But she was quite tough wife to live with terrible mother for her children. Despite the abundance of money in the house fight among husband and wife was part of daily routine .My aunt would fight on little things with her in laws too on daily bases almost. I grew up watching their fights. Consequently all of her children suffered with this habit and grew into quarrelsome people. sadly. That led them to many complications in their lives .Taro baji ,the eldest daughter of my uncle was only child who was saved from such harsh nature. And i see her only son she left behind is living a peaceful and successful life with nice family (i met them after long during my recent trip to attend my cousin's kids marriage )

Back to the story ,my eldest cousin Liaquat was kind of lonesome and confused man with sad eyes and less words. He would drive one of his father's truck and would return from his long trips after week or two. Whenever he would come to home his mother would fight with him ruthlessly. My uncle would not try to make her stop and escape away instead. He was afraid of her anger everybody said so. 

Liaquat would visit our house sometimes and sit with mom to share his domestic issues . I realized even as little girl that all the children of my uncle had special affection towards my mother because of her kind and loving nature . I feel they would seek refuge in her attention. It was natural reaction from children treated at home violently. When they grew up into teenage  i heard often from one of my female cousins(same family) that she would love to be daughter in law of my mother . I am witnessed of their tears they shed when my mother apologized both of her nieces ,because she was afraid to make such tie with her sister in law who was known for being so cruel and combative . My mom felt sadness for her whole life but she knew it was correct decision for her only son. 

When my cousin would come to home he would behave nicely and show respective behavior towards me such as greeting properly(putting palm of hand on head as greeting gesture that means i consider this girl my respectful relative and will never look at her with bad eye)  .He would take corner away from where i would do any chore or he would sit in separate room away so i don't feel uneasy. I mean i saw no hint of vulgarity in his behavior so i could ask my mom to ban him from our house. The other reason for ease could be that he was older than me at least one decade or more. He was the only male cousin allowed into our house because of his melancholic and decent nature. But there was something going on behind the curtain actually.

 I was in grade five or six when i realized that eldest sister of my uncle (eldest sister of Liaquat ) Taro baji started to take special interest in me . Taro baji was totally unlike her mother and had very gentle and wise nature .She was married to an aggressive man who had drug addiction and would beat her sometimes .She insisted to stay with him despite her parents wanted her separation. Taro baji was twelve to fifeten years older than me. Taro baji started to visit our house often now specially when i would get  back from school and do my homework. She would drag me with her home often and mostly talk about how bad it is for girls to study instead of learning cooking and other skills at home that are important for running household and that looking after husband and kids is the only thing a girl should learn to do .According to her studies spoil girls mindset and mislead them from actual path of life. She would cuddle me and speak such things daily almost. I thought she is being just herself and that is it. Then she would sometimes take me to her elder brother's room in his absence and show his things and would say nice things him. One day she opened a cupboard and showed a note book with pink pages. It had my name written on it with in red decoratively. She said Liaquat has written your name with his blood and he wants to marry you. I felt shocked and puzzled suddenly. I ran back to home and told the mother whole story . She seemed annoyed but not that much i expected. She told that my cousin liaquat had been showing his interest in you since long but she has no such thing in mind.

 In short my cousin did not seem to stop on convincing my mom only but secretly he was brainwashing my elder brother as well so he can pressurize my mother. My brother had  quite flirting  nature and wanted to marry since he was fifteen hardly . It was tradition exchange cousin marriages. So He  would always ask mom to get him married one of his cousin and give my hand to one of his cousins in return. Actually my brother always showed hatter towards mom's decision to send us school . Now my cousin's fuel made him burst out loudly. My brother had started to fight my with mother for this cause once in awhile .To make his point he first time burnt my poetry note books alongwith my school bag when in ten i think . This memory is among most painful ones !

While burning my poetry notebooks and school books he shouted and mentioned name of Liaquat that he does not like her to go to school and wants to get married with her but you are refusing the proposal of boy to whom  others will give their daughters happily. 

In short such things kept happening and if anyone can ponder a little can understand why i could never concentrate on studies fully. The fear of falling into any such dungeon kept my soul occupied all the time. (The second time our school books and bags were burnt when i was in eight .This time my poetry notebooks were spared because i had kept hidden already). 

My mother stopped meeting my cousin Liaquat . He would not come and if he would mom would not allow him inside and meet with him outside the house as she could not push him away completely because of her gentle nature. Once when i was in grade seven or eight Liaquat knocked our door and showed my mom set of jewelry and asked her to keep it for him for while as he will explain later because he is in trouble. My mother refused first but on his insistence she kept it with promise that he will come back and have it back in two days. most. She had no idea he was jeopardizing ,because she trusted him like her own son. Next day when  my mother went in village below ,her friends congratulated her for my engagement with Liaquat. My mother in shock ran to my uncle's house immediately and asked why they spread such rumors . My aunt replied that Liaquat told he has given you the necessary things for the engagement already and  today we are coming for the engagement ceremony. My mother searched for Liaquat ,found him and returned his jewelry back instantly. She was crying while saying him that he must have not cheated like this as she loved him like son. This was last scene of that drama though needless to say how badly my aunt reacted on this.And we faced that storm for few next days.

My mother later said that Liaquat was nice boy but he had bad habit of taking drugs which he finds impossible to give up because drivers who drive for days taking drug is necessary. My mother said if it wasn't the case she might have consented on this proposal. She felt he was loosing himself in the darkness and this marriage could have save him. I secretly thanked God for Liaquat insisted on drugs Sorry if sounds selfish but i have to be honest) . 

After that soon liaquat got married to one of his divorced cousin Yasmeen who lived in Islamabad alone and work in different places as domestic helper or babysitter since she her early teens . They had three boys together. Yasmeen had one daughter already from first husband. Their marriage could not last longer than few years (five to seven probably) and Yasmeen decided to take divorce because Liaquat was fighting with her all the time. According to her Liaquat fights and during fights he piles up everything in the house and burns it . After the divorce Liaquat increased drugs dose heavily and died soon because of it. I think he was in mid or late 30s .

I heard about his death after my marriage.I felt sad genuinely because he was my cousin. Long before this when i was in school Liaquat had hit two children while driving under the affect of drugs. The accident took place in Peshawar city where Pakhtoon people  live with their old traditions. This accident had killed two innocent children on the spot .The men of the area stopped the truck and attacked by throwing rocks and beating Liaquat by hands and stick . He was injured badly. Men were about to kill him with axes when some of their older ladies came between and put their head shawls on the feet of angry men and asked to forgive the Liaquat. He was lucky to gain pity of those mourning families surprisingly. This old tradition of  pakhtoon people that oldest ladies head scarfs are most respectful thing after the Holy book (Quran)  saved him that day miraculously. They did not even report against him and left him alone simply. I don't think there can be any justification or excuse that makes taking drugs normal . 

The life he was given back that day by the God was wasted away once again by his thoughtlessness unfortunately !

Thanks for bearing with , i try harder to keep it short ,there are so many things related but i will share them in future hopefully in slow pace .

God Bless You All!


Sunday, May 5, 2024

The Good Out Of Bad

 I have written in my post  The odds of cousins  about something sad that had happened to me more than forty five years ago when i was 7 and in first grade, in my first school at neighboring village . That village was bigger than ours,It  had few hundred people but no basic facility of any type except school just itself.

One of my blogger friend Margaret said in her kind comment that she is sure there was something good that came out of bad. Todays post is response to her comment .When i read her words my mind later wandered in past when i had to leave my first school due to such harsh circumstances.

Actually my mother had skipped the better option had put me there only so i could get company of my cousins on the way to school .We had moved  there two years ago and i was totally unfamiliar with surroundings and paths outside our village. 

 That better option was a middle school (from one to eighth grade) in  New Khanpur town also close to our village. New Khanpur was freshly built and largely populated town where all the land lords of our area had lived since long .New Khanpur was built on the place of old khanpur that was bought by government for the purpose to built the dam on Haro river . The town had all the basic facilities for the people including post office ,schools and colleges for boys and girls ,hospital, banks and many others.

Town was linked within and around with finely constructed  roads unlike others in area.The reason behind such perfection was different land lords who were members of provincial and national assemblies.

Girls middle school was finest school in the area . It had some finest teachers as well. Some teachers were ladies belonged to land lords houses because despite they had studied in best institutions of the national or international countries ,they weren't allowed  to do any other job away from home except teaching that was considered modest and solo decent job for girls back then.The school principal was also from such strong background. Other teachers were also from competitive and well educated families which reflected in their personalities fairly .

Students in new khanpur middle girls school were no exception too. Most of the girls belonged to well stablished families such as doctor ,layers ,businessmen and distinctive teachers and principals in the area. Many girls belonged to goldsmiths families who owned a well known gold market in the town. I think only 30percent girls belonged to poor families or lower middle class families like me. 

The first best thing happened to me was that i found myself in totally different environment  than previous school that was relaxing because it had girls only and all the teachrs were females. The first relief was that i was free from toxic company of my cousins while walking to school. It would take ten to fifteen minute to cross the hill top walk and get on road that would straight lead to school in seven to five minutes . That was fresh beginning of beautiful journey and wonderful school time. Therefore those school days will shine sharply in my memory chest always. 

I read there for nine years and i am happy that those were some of the most beautiful years of my teenage life. The friendly supportive environment  added lots of confidence in me in coming years slowly. I was never a bright student in terms of writing but there was no match for me when it would come to tell oral answers of all subjects. I was good in math until primary classes. But my performance dropped from six grade and remained same until i passed my tenth grade somehow. My mother thought to have tutor for me and she had arranged one but i refused to take class second day as he was not comfortable to study with or i thought so. 

This was nice that despite being a common girl from poor family my teachers appreciated justly whenever they found something extra good in me as student. For example when school principal learnt that i could write poetry and short stage shows for school events and farewell parties ,she called me in her office and had little chat about that. Then she encouraged me and asked to keep writing for school . When she was transferred to other school the next principal also showed kindness towards me in quite special way .She was daughter of famous judge of Haripur city that was district back then. She would call me sometimes in her office which was quite big deal for other girls and even for teachers and ask to read what piece of poetry i have written lately. She was first person in my life who said showed such admiration. It was confidence given by her encouragement that i could write letters to my favorite radio show regularly that was anchored by Ahsan uncle .A philosopher and one of most popular radio host those days. Ahsan Uncle 's appreciation for my letters strengthened my spirit and awakened sense of self awareness and huge interest in life's philosophy . 

I had met some really sweet teachers in that school who inspired me in may ways . It was not just study time there .For me it was beginning of learning how to live life actually.

I got few amazing friends there as well. Though most of them aren't in touch but we keep asking for each other from our single link which is Shazia my only school friend in touch .The memories of times we spend together are hallmark of my teenage life .

I feel i am still missing something to point out in todays post but i will keep sharing when it will awake in my memories and whenever i find more time to write relaxingly instead of hurriedly. 

Thanks Margaret for the words so i could share more about how many good came out of that bad . 

I will post soon second part of Odds of Cousins hopefully.

May God keep you all in his blessings always! 


Tuesday, April 30, 2024

The Posture Matters And Renewed Dining Table

 Hello sweet hearts 

Hope beating beautifully on the rhythm of life !

Remember we had a dining table . Hubby have get it made on order eight years back almost. We loved how elegant it looked. It was like dream come true to have our own dinning table. I would love to enjoy family meals together whenever kids visited home specially .But when torrential rain occurred two years back hubby decided to move the dining table in veranda due to trembling roof. It had rained for three months almost in our city . We got our all the roofs trembled  during rains except our bedroom and portion of our veranda attached to it. Later when the rains passed hubby found it appropriate to keep the table in study room (third room where kids study). I objected on the decision because dinning table would help us a lot when we have guests. It seems easy to clean the dinning table instead of all the vast area where children eat and make mess .Hubby said let's keep it on side for while as i see table is huge and takes half of the room  which restricts our movement as well. I found the reason genuine so table was put there for two years. The second thing i missed meanwhile was writing posts while sitting on dinning chair which keeps my posture straight and it naturally help my brain work properly.

Last week hubby brought few carpenters who examined the table if it can cut down from sides and turn into oval shape . The deal settled with one man who mentioned that plate (upper sheet) of the table can be broken during process of separation of it's legs. But it did not happen luckily and table  was ready within one day .Wanted to share my joy with you as it looks nicer than before and fits in smaller part of the room which is satisfactory. I am happy i found the table back and writing this post while sitting on it's chair .It is feeling of ease :)

Thanks for kind comments on previous post dear friends !



                                                                               God bless you all!

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