This is the topic upon which i thought over and over throughout my life . I born in area where the society is male dominated though , but in totality when i contemplate on the situations that women encounter all over the world
i think the whole world is MALE DOMINATED .
No matter how advanced the countries are and how modern the appearances have become it does not change the attitude of men towards women.
I am not saying that each man is Dog (sorry mr Dogs, if i insulted you) but most of them behave like them .When they look at woman their eyes seem to get wider and tongues drops on the floor like carpet under the feet of women .In rural areas you can see the symptoms CLEARLY but in Modern areas dogs i mean men are expert to hide their thrill .
Reason is so simple because men who act like this " loose control over their brains ( poor shameless creatures) and start thinking through their specific bundle of organs" instead of brain.
Physical hungers are alike to stomach hunger and is from basic human instinct but how weird that " if the Civilized looking people when feel hungry they hesitate to ask for sandwich from others or don't push themselves to snatch food from the lunch box of anyone else " .
They control their hunger and behave like good civilized people so people around them can keep respecting them.
How shameful that such well educated and finely appeared men behave like hungry wild animals when they find women front of them . Their all other senses go off!, except one "the desperation to release their water in pots which are not their's .
In my head this question arises with power that
WHY THIS HAPPEN IN MODERN COUNTRIES WHEN THEIR PEOPLE HAVE FREEDOM OF CHOICES?
THERE ARE SHOPS OF "STRESS RELEASING ORGANS TOO.
THERE IS EXPOSURE OF FEMALE PARTNERS AVAILABLE .
Then what make men to Harass or rape woman ?
First psychological reason can be that ,
" Because they know that victim is physically easy to overcome " this is what make them feel free to try.
Second reason can be ,
"they know that mostly there is no chance for punishment either "
Over the centuries women are being beaten ,burnt ,murdered and raped by such sick men but there are rare examples of women when women striked back and fought for her honour .When victims were successful in giving criminals proper punishment through law or by themselves.
In my country Pakistan Mukhtar Mai is great example of courage and bravery .
Main problem starts with " fear" that is injected in the blood of eastern women for men outside , fear is good it keeps us save most of the time but what about when it cannot?
Women must be given physical trainings as part of their studies on serious bases .There must be a separate subject for women from early stage of education to make her grow with awareness ,will power and self confidence ,
No menly government will do this because most of the rapist sit on those powerful seats and set free their followers to exploit weaker part of the population the way they want.
Women need to do this by on their own ,by connecting with each other and by founding some kind of foundation which must work for this purpose constantly .Constant falling of water drop makes hole in stone so i am sure that such regular efforts will bring positive consequences for future women.
May be this sound small and raw idea but focusing on small issues we can solve huge problems ,Each unique and huge idea sounds crazy and useless to common heads but history reveals that they brought revolutionary changes on the map of world later.
Women of this World must recognize these weak points and must work on them to make their strongest point.
Woman has ability to give birth to a man so she can turn him into a harmless social animal for sure by being a Good mother first of all .
By educating their boys that how they must treat women ,to treat women respectfully they must have respectful attitude for women and only mothers can make this happen.
Mostly we are made to think that women is not targeted if she is between the walls or she hide herself in cover while going out .Men have different ways to harass women . They harass women with cover secretly and women with bold look openly .
It does not matter how Modest she is.
It does not matter how bold she is .
What matter is " the way man look at her " to him she is only a "flesh" to attack on ".
there are numerous cases where daughters and sisters were sexually abused by their own brothers ,fathers ,father in laws ,uncles or cousins .
Almost two years back a newly married girl from neighborhood came to me. She was crying so badly and asked me to ask my husband to convince her husband to get her a separate house because her father in law was abusing her sexually .Even he removed the lock of her room's door and she was not able to sleep out of fear and terror .
That man is 77 or even more and his impression is of a very religious man who made his son divorced his first wife just because she was not covering her head properly (actually she was not allowing that bastard to get her pants off) as she was bold and daring to raise her voice against him and got divorce within three months. Second wife his son is (who came to me) an orphan and shy .whom he thought easy target .
I told her that no one can help her until she will ,i convinced her to tell everything to her husband loud and clear and protest against her father in law's dirty acts ,she did and finally today she is living peacefully in upper story of house.
This is also a fact that there are bunch of women who are easy to approach and keep tag on of "available" It increases the wildness of wiled dogs . But if they consider themselves man not dog then they should know that "man has self respect" which saves him from being disgrace like this.
If they have "self respect" they will turn their head even from the naked woman who stand in front of them with offer.
Selfrespect differentiate man from animals .Animal act according to their natural instincts but man is meant to be well esteemed ,well behaved and modified in skills of his presence in society There must be difference between both though!
My precious friends today's post is dedicated to protesters of America against Harvey Weinstein of hollywood .
Please take great care .
Believe that you are strongest and you will be because our thoughts make us what we are today.
God Bless You All!!!
Baili - I have no idea why some men think it's their God Given Gift to rape a women, or even think about raping, sexually harassing a women.
ReplyDeleteHere in Australia the younger women can wear bikini to at the beach it's normal, but unfortunately some men do not behave at the sight of a women in such attire - they don't used their brains or they don't have any or just a few.
I recall I walked down the street in Brisbane in short shorts and a bikini top and men turned their heads some bumped into parking meters, it was normal to walk down the street like that back then - so I don't know what's wrong with some men, and I guess I never will know.
The issue that you raise in indeed a world wide one. It is a terrible human rights violations and it needs to be seriously addressed. Many women that I know personally have endured this.
ReplyDeleteI agree that there are things to be done to prevent this. I believe that more women in positions of authority, and a better system where women can report harassment and the perpetrators punished would help I also agree with you that a changed attitude will also improve the situation.
I am glad to hear that the woman that you mentioned stood up for herself and is doing well now.
Have a great week!
A girl or woman must do what she has to do to survive an attack. Letting the lid off the Pandora’s box of secrecy about sexual harassment and assault is the beginning. We have a long way to go to have a ssociety where people respect themselves and each other.
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ReplyDeleteI feel so bad for the women in your post here. That is horrifying.
I have led a protected life, it seems, but I still think this is not the norm as the world would have us believe. It’s not all men. There are heroes among us. :) I am raising sons and they are not monsters.
It is an abuse of power. So glad also that you were able to help that poor woman.
ReplyDeleteMen I know ask why so many women didn't speak up when it happened. I say, "Until your are a woman do not judge." You are quiet because you have no voice, no platform, no mentors. That is until someone, somewhere has what it takes to stand up and speak out. That person graciously allows others to borrow a little strength, bravery and community to get up and do the same.
ReplyDeleteEverything you say is true.
ReplyDeleteThese sexual abuses are not because the male desires the female. It is strictly to exert his dominance over her. If he desired her he would do everything in his power to make her feel safe. Instead he is doing everything he can to make her fear him and submit to his power. These are males who feel powerless in other ways and are trying to bolster themselves in their own eyes. That is why they keep their actions hidden. The reasons females don't come forward are many. It is often her word against his. Sometimes there are possibly other areas of her life (real or imagined) that would be harmed and even destroyed if she said something. Most of us were raised to "behave like a lady" at all times so we feel that we did something wrong to cause the abuse. A large percentage of females around the world have experienced unwanted sexual encounters. And most keep it secret from everyone because they feel responsible along with feeling victimized. Let me say that we all see other humans who are nice to look at. It is like art. We like beautiful things. But we look to appreciate the beauty, not for salacious reasons. I hope that bringing these reprehensible acts out into the open will make it easier for anyone who is expected to put up with unwanted advances to come forward and point to the person so it will not be considered normal behavior.
ReplyDeleteThank you for speaking out on these worldwide problems, Baili! What a powerful post, my dear friend ~ And a courageous one! So far men in western society have largely been able to get away with such behavior because they didn't have to fear consequences. Women hesitated to speak up because it could cost them their reputations and their chosen careers and they would be considered responsible for what happened. Men are perfectly capable of controlling themselves if they so choose. It's all about power and control. Harvey Weinstein is only one of many rich and powerful men who have subjected women to unwanted sexual encounters or sexual harassment. I'm hoping that the tide is beginning to turn with women starting to speak up.
ReplyDeleteEverything you say is true. I think most men are not like this but it only takes a few to make all men seem bad.
ReplyDeleteI read an article that claimed most crimes are due to a genetic disease, the Y chromosome. Men have an X and a Y (XY) but women have two X's (XX). It claimed the proof was the fact that prisons are for the most part occupied by males.
I don't think this is true. It's the fault of our culture. I am sure your kids will be kind and intelligent.
This is an intelligent and powerful essay, baili - well said. Women do need to be strong and behave as the equals they believe themselves to be and indeed are. Mothers do need to teach their sons respect for women and also to teach their daughters to be strong.
ReplyDeleteI agree with John M that many men are not like this. It must be hard for those good men to be painted with the same brush as the bad ones.
It is such a horrific thing that you speak of Baili! It is true that here in America many women are protected from such evil things, but there is no doubt that it is a problem. The advice you gave your friend who visited you was wise, and I'm so thankful that things have gotten better for her. I truly don't know what the answer is, but it is good to talk about what to do about it.
ReplyDeleteVery well said Baili, you have some excellent ideas on educating women today to protect the women of tomorrow, small ideas to accomplish big things, you are a very smart woman.
ReplyDeleteI had a commenter on my blog point out that rape is not necessarily about sex but more about having power over their victim, it is sad that the powerful take advantage of the weak.
Respect as you pointed out is a big problem, no one seems to respect each other anymore, and the men who respect women will protect them rather than abuse them, teaching our children to respect themselves and each other will help raise a generation that respects women.
Excellent post my friend, you have some great ideas.
Mostly male.
ReplyDeleteBut also female (Demi Moore).
I have to confess I'm getting kind of suspicious with all these situations.
For many years there was nothing but silence.
All of a sudden everyone is or was a sexual predator?
Smells like $$$, lots of $$$
great blog.thanks for sharing it.
ReplyDeletehttp://parkview.com.pk/
Wonderfully written, Baili. A subject that grows worse as time goes on. It is a sign of end times along with plagues, famines, earthquakes, violent weather, etc. The magnitude of all these things are killing our earth.
ReplyDeleteThis is a very important topic and beautifully written. Men can behave better if they are raised to, if they are held accountable and if our culture expects them to. The first step begins at home, of course. Parents have a huge influence on their children.
ReplyDeleteBaili my dear, this is a very disturbing post, but very important. In the age of women's liberation, I also believe that we are still living in a male-dominated society in every respect. But not just that they have the highest salaries etc...many men still are very misogynistic. I see it daily. Sorry to men in general, I'm not bashing because I'm sure many women are horrific as well. I'm speaking out of my own experience living where I live. I remember going to an Italian restaurant once with Alex. In Montreal, a very metropolis supposedly advanced-thinking city. The host was an old Italian guy. Completely ignored me, only talked to Alex and gave Alex the menu first, when I wanted to order, he ignored me and said "What will it be sir?"...Alex said, "my girlfriend and I have changed our minds." and we left. Alex always puts me first, and for that I'm grateful, but I find he is the minority. I agree with Martha that they need to learn to be good people and it starts with their upbringing.
ReplyDeleteOh...and my dogs aren't offended ;)
ReplyDeleteDear Baili, I'm so sorry about the girl who was being abused by father-in-law, that's terrible. She was just newly married, and that should have been a happy time for her. She came to you, and it sounds like you helped her in many ways. I'm glad she is living peacefully in another house. Thank you for sharing your innermost thoughts today, dear one.
ReplyDelete~Sheri
Attitudes and behaviours need to change.
ReplyDeleteIt is a terrible time we all now live in. So sad.
Sending love to you dear Baili x
What a powerful post you have given us dear Baili
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your thoughts with us here
All the best Jan
This is such a sad thing, Baili. Women and children are always living in fear. I pray for the men of this world who need to be enlightened and for all the victims of their predatory behavior. I don't think there is any woman on earth who has not been subjected to being harassed and worse. You are right that Mothers must educate their sons. But Fathers must set a good example for how to be an honorable man. Hopefully, shining a bright light on these behaviors will heal this broken world. Hugs xo Karen
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ReplyDeleteI found this post really interesting, dearest Baili. And, yes, I too have suffered this kind of harassment quite a few times in my life.
ReplyDeleteHowever, there does also appear to be a trend now for some females to "jump on the bandwagon" and use the term "abuse" in order to have revenge on a man for any slight reason (or, indeed, to obtain money)...and that is bad news for all those women who are genuine victims of real abuse...in that they are no longer taken so seriously. (Coincidentally, I have just posted this very subject on my blog!)
Yes, this is such a difficult subject...and attitudes need to change really urgently...if we are ever to have genuine equality between the sexes.
A brilliant and insightful post, my dear Friend!
Thank you so much.:))
Big Hugs xoxoxo
this has been going on since the beginning of time. unfortunately for me, i know the problem intimately. i am always baffled why men feel superior to women...why there is so much abuse. it's not new, it is not about money....
ReplyDeletewhen a woman is abused, she is embarrassed, withdrawn and feels like no one will believe her. when others come forward, she is empowered by their bravery and feels like she has the strength in numbers to do what she has never been able to do for years!!
it stays with you for life and you are never really the same!!!
Hi Baili! Thank you so much for your visit and leaving me such a lovely comment! I'm glad you stopped by because now I have found you. You have an amazing blog where I can learn about you and your culture; and you're so positive!!! I'm happy to know you have a loving and wonderful husband who loves you and respects. Have a wonderful day!
ReplyDeleteYou tell it like it is sister! You are right on! I had wonderful Uncles and men in my family that were respectful and there was equality in their marriages and in their community. But when I went out in the world I discovered they were in the minority! I have always said it is the elephant in the room.....men do most crimes, murders, wars, etc. so if 50% of the population is to blame then they should be made to clean up their messes. I have 3 sons and I raised them to respect women and I taught them to clean, sew, iron etc. so they would not have to depend on anyone else but also so my daughter-in-laws would like me! LOL! In my career I was a systems programmer but I was harassed and not allowed to do the job they hired me for as I worked with all men. I learned education has nothing to do with how they behave! They were terrible and I loved my work but they took the joy out of everything I had worked for. Anyway, I have been through the mill in my life with men and I loved my uncles but I haven't met men like that since. I am a strong woman but if you speak out you are a 'man hater' or a 'lesbian' of which I am neither but if I was there would be nothing wrong with that either as this is supposedly a free country. This is coming out now in Hollywood and politics but it has gone on for years especially with women who work outside the home or are professionals. I live alone now and I am retired and I am extremely happy but even the male neighbors here harass me. But I speak up and out and I will never allow myself to be bullied. I have more guts than brains! LOL! In the U.S. they think they are 'free' and the best country but there are other countries like Iceland for one that are truly equal and respectful and I'm sure there are others. I was born here in the U.S. but I am not proud of my country any more. Our 'leaders' are of low morals and values and an embarrassment to us. Thank you for this post as I have few women friends as they think I am 'too liberal' and outspoken....LOL! I am proud to know you and glad to hear a woman speak her mind and not try and sugar coat things to be 'popular' or a peace maker. In my mind, peace at any price is not peace! You go girl!
ReplyDeleteSome men do behave like dogs but not all. And it is true that women are being ill-treated everywhere. But there are many men out there who are heroes and fight for what is right and they are protectors of their womenfolks.
ReplyDeleteWhat a powerful post!! Thank you!!! Big Hugs!
ReplyDeleteNot all man are abusive. Many protects their woman. Guess it depends on the up bringing of a family.
ReplyDeleteVery well said! I've also been thinking quite a lot about this.
ReplyDeleteAmalia
xo
this has all been in the news as you know, it really amazes me some of the men that are charged with these acts, ones you would never believe, I am blessed with a husband that respects woman, we had a daughter so I don't know what it is like raising a boy but I know it is a great thing when a mother and father can get it through their sons head not to treat women like a piece of meat to do with what they please, hopefully all this talk will get it through their minds that treating women like this can not go on any further, I am so glad you were able to talk your neighbor into speaking to her husband and that he helped her out of that situation.
ReplyDeleteDear Baili – This is a powerful post about deep, serious social problem. Each country is dominated by men more or less. In my country, the number of women in the decision-making position is low all among the developed countries, though there are so many respectful, kind-hearted men. It’s about upbringing. Older generation can’t change their mentality but young people who were taught about equality between men and women can share childrearing and help around the house. (It is said that a man who changes diapers will change the world.) As to the abusive men, it’s also family environment. Abused boys grow into abusive husbands. Another reason is that society hasn’t punished enough the sexual harassment. At last recently, people understand sexual molestation is a CRIME.
ReplyDeleteYoko
I think it is utterly disgusting how some men treat women... not all men as some men have been raised properly... but some of them make me so sick, I want to say who the heck do they they think they are. I married a Russian man who was raised to think women had no choice... he learned a hard lesson with me... It is despicable how some people think the way they think...
ReplyDeleteIf I had had a son, I would have taught him to love and respect women... I raised my daughters to respect themselves and to tell the truth of how someone might treat them improperly, I will believe them and stand up for them ... xox