I have mentioned many times that i am not smart or clever person .
Why i said so ?
Because Now in the age of 48 when i look at my whole life i find that i never acted like smart person !
I still remember in my school i was kind and sweet to everyone .
Even to whom who never liked me, bullied and misbehaved .
My anger was channelize only for opposite gender , and my reaction to their stupid actions was stern !
I studied in girls high school so that was like heaven for me ,i liked to be surrounded with lots of girls and sweet teachers.
Many of girls and only few teachers were rude to me and they have their own reasons for their dislikening .
I was not one who gave them those reasons so i did not care what they think of me and why they tried to let down me, strangely in which they never succeeded .
Though i belonged to a lower middle class family yet the principal of school was so kind and sweet to me and she often invited me in her office and asked that i must ask her if there is some problem in studies or of other kind.
My girlfriends thought of me that i was totally stupid because i don't even want to listen their stories about various male cousins or other boys they were interested in .
If they had to have chat about their crush on boys celebrities they had to get away from me as topic was annoying for me.
Second foolishness was that i was more interested in elderly people ,i would manage to serve them ,to listen them and have discussions with them about various topics related to their lives or situations.
Third stupidity was that from my early teens to until i got married in age of almost 20 i used to cry like my eyes have endless oceans of tears .
Why did i cry as much? Was it my concern only ? or was it was in my hands to fulfill the necessaries of all? (Stupid me)
In my imagination so many hungry ,poor and helpless people accompanied me all the time which put me in deep sense of guilt .
Each time i eat ,play ,lay on my cozy bed or put head on mom's lap ,i would think of those who had no food ,no home or suffering because of their illness and starving for help.
After my marriage my husband beared my all foolishness so courageously and slowly put in my mind that "first of all you should believe in God "
"Then believe that what ever he has made has correct reasons behind it"
" We all born as equals with the recognition of RIGHT and WRONG"
" We are Free to make choices and decisions"
" Our choices lead us to our destinations"
"Destiny (will of God) is with who chose RIGHT path"
" Differences in our status are not only due to our mental and physical strategy for life but DUE TO THE DESTINY OR WILL OF GOD"
" Life is gift and a TEST either "
" God tests us by giving his blessings and by taking them away"
" When he gives somebody LOT!
It is TEST how he uses it to benefit the others around him"
"If God Gives someone Nothing is TEST HOW He purse for it ?"
"Will He prefer shortcut which is way to hurt others ?"
"Or he choose long and right way to achieve it?"
It took quite effort ,patience and time of my husband to mold me in a little better mental approach which i am today!
Still , when i have to say No to sales girls who come on door ,i feel so low and i can't feel better unless i drop some tears from my eye (Old habits don't leave easily, yes)
Many times i ask my hubby "Why God did not make everybody equally strong physically , economically and mentally ???
So everybody can be self dependent and can never get hurt because he is weak in any means."
Hubby replays "If in this world everyone is able to have everything ,NO one will do small jobs like cleaning ,plumbing, fixing or repairing things and millions of jobs like this which make basic chain of work ,demand and supply in any society !
"Who will sew your clothes or build your house who is already millioner ?"
and i think ,think and think but no solution comes in my head.
DO YOU ALSO THINK THAT IF EVERYBODY WAS BILL GATES PEOPLE OF THIS WORLD WOULD BE IN PROBLEM???
Please answer because i am not smart enough to figure it out!
God Bless You All!!!
You are smart! But even more important, you have feelings for life and people and living this life in a positive and caring way.
ReplyDeleteHugs
💮❤💮
You got me dear Jan!
DeleteI feel MORE THAN I THINK AND YOU KNOW WHAT SHAKESPEARE HAS SAID ABOUT SUCH PEOPLE
Yes, definitely if everyone was Bill Gates we would be in trouble!
ReplyDeleteI think it's sweet that you wanted to talk more to elderly people and gain their wisdom.
Thank you dear Sandi!
DeleteSo your vote is to hubby
Yes and this affection for old people was when I was child .it was hard to understand for people around me but i followed my heart and served them as I could
Communism claims to make all equal and generally ends up with most having nothing and a very few happy to keep it that way. I do think it is the responsibility of the very wealthy to have compassion, and in fact Bill Gates does a great deal of charitable work.
ReplyDeletei agree with you Joe !
Deletei live in a democratic country where electronics and vehicles are far expensive than advanced countries and can't tell you how wealthy people show off to have more expensive cars or other stuff
I respect Bill gates for his compassionate way of thinking as he gives away almost 30 % of his total earnings which is daring as i know so many who have countless amount dut do not donate a penny
Yes Baili, we would all be in trouble if everyone was Bill Gates!
ReplyDeleteI used to own a very large coffeehouse. When I started working there as an employee, the owner, who was a property developer, was very interesting to me. I'd never met anyone in his field. Over time, I came to see that when he was speaking on the phone, talking about real estate and building and the such, he sounded like a genius. But I also watched him suffer when trying to hold a normal conversation with someone at the counter of the coffeehouse.
When I eventually bought the coffeehouse from him, he told me " You belong here Nicolas. I watch you with people and I realize that what you have, your way with people, I will never have. All these years I wanted to be like YOU, to be someone people looked forward to seeing when they walked in that door."
Can you imagine that? What came naturally to me, he could not conjure for himself. Just as I could never have been a property developer who worked on deals and built buildings. He had put a lifetime into his work as I had in mine.
So we all have our place, our gifts and our purposes.
And if the world were made of billions of any of us, it would be a far less interesting place than it is. That's the grace of God.
it is truly a GREAT deal Nicolas!
Deletethank you for such wonderful sharing , you can't imagine how much it put to my relief!
like our all other various conditions ,we do have UNIQUE way of thinking which differentiate us from others and the TRUE victory lies beneath it
You are a wonderful person!
ReplyDeleteI think you are very smart Baili, very thoughtful and you ask some good thought-provoking questions. Interesting idea...if we were all rich, who would do the dirty jobs? I'm sure I would still do as much as I could for myself, but I'm not like most people. Very philosophical question that makes my brain hurt lol! ;)
ReplyDeleteFirst of all my dear, dear friend I am upset that you think you are stupid. You simply were unfortunate to be around so many people who did not or do not have the same views as you. You are strong because you do not allow others to change your convictions without showing you a valid reason to do so. Most very intelligent people do not see things the same way as others and often feel isolated because of it. You cry because you have empathy. You feel the other person's pain. There is nothing wrong with you. You live and believe on a higher plane than a lot of people that's all.
ReplyDeleteDear Emma I feel lucky to read your generous words!
DeleteHow amazing that we live so many miles away physically from each other yet YOU HAVE REALISED THE BIGGEST LACK IN MY LIFE WHICH HAVE HURT ME MORE THAN ANYTHING AND WHICH IS THAT I NEVER FOUND A CONGINEAL person to whom I can talk with my genuine way about everything
You are smart, you have allowed life's experiences to help you grow.
ReplyDeleteThat in part is what life is about :-)
People who think about life, people and the world as you do, Baili, are not stupid.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you dear Marie!
DeleteBut though i am proud that God loved me enough to make not as clever who can ruin other for the sake of personal benefits
Still there come some weak moments in life sometimes when i wish alas I could be a little more WORLDLY person
I just wanted to say that you are smart AND caring! I think you are doing good by sharing your thoughts, too! Hugs, Diane
ReplyDeleteThrough blogging I have found you to live life in a positive and caring way... we need more people to feel and do the same.
ReplyDeleteAll the best Jan
I think you have a very kind soul, Baili. You are sensitive and caring about other people and the world around you. The world needs more people like you, not less.
ReplyDeleteOh Baili, it is much better to be sweet, kind, and caring than to be the smartest person. And you are one of the sweetest souls in blog land. I thank you for that. We're always learning and growing, and I think it's so special that you appreciate the elderly and try to take care of them. I have always had a soft spot for them as well. I know what you mean about being fascinated with male celebrities.....it's such foolishness to me.
ReplyDeleteStay the way you are, dear Baili. You have a heart as big as the ocean, and it shows when you're concerned with the poor, the suffering, and the helpless in this world.
~Sheri
Oh Baili, it is much better to be sweet, kind, and caring than to be the smartest person. And you are one of the sweetest souls in blog land. I thank you for that. We're always learning and growing, and I think it's so special that you appreciate the elderly and try to take care of them. I have always had a soft spot for them as well. I know what you mean about being fascinated with male celebrities.....it's such foolishness to me.
ReplyDeleteStay the way you are, dear Baili. You have a heart as big as the ocean, and it shows when you're concerned with the poor, the suffering, and the helpless in this world.
~Sheri
You are very hard on yourself. The fact that you think of these things and ask these questions is a sign of intelligence.
ReplyDeleteI think that different people are different. Some are stronger then others but some are strong in different ways.
I do agree that if no one had to work then not enough people would work. So needs and wants are often necessary to motivate people.
Have a great week!
You are smarter than you think Baili - you are clever, kind and caring - you learn so much from older people, and they in turn would enjoy your company.
ReplyDeleteYour husband is correct in what he says, well I agree with him :)
Salesman are not permitted to sell things at our doors here on this Island, but charities come once in awhile.
Everyone makes mistakes.
ReplyDeleteAs long as we learn from them is not serious.
It's even a good sign - means we're alive.
You are a lovely person...
ReplyDeleteYou are right the world is not fair or equal in lots of ways, I have no explanition for it but I see people at the top with all the money and power are not always the right people to be there, they are not kind and caring but only interested in themselves.
ReplyDeleteMerle............
You have a compassionate heart, Baili, and that is a sign of emotional intelligence. We can never know another's path and the reasons why, but I believe we all have very specific lessons to learn in life. Even someone with immense wealth might have unknown sorrow and certainly many obligations. Who is to say which path results in the greater wisdom and lessons in life? I believe that true wealth is in the heart that values every experience as an opportunity to advance the soul. We never know who is an angel in disguise. Sending you hugs and blessings xo Karen
ReplyDeleteAnother very interesting and thought-provoking post from you, dearest Baili.
ReplyDeleteThere can't be economies where everyone is very rich, and fortunately many people love sewing or building houses. Also a plumber can feel proud of his/her work as a tradesperson. There are jobs that are unpleasant, dirty, dangerous... and in my ideal world they would be especially well paid. :)
I believe in God, but I don't think the manifestation of evil and injustice in the world can be explained simply that God is testing us. The problem is, I believe, more complicated.
I'm so happy to know you through blogging. Blessings and hugs!
Dearest Baili...you are so like me!
ReplyDeleteThe way we think is almost identical...and I especially related to your comment about feeling awful about turning people away when they come to sell things at your door. I would much rather hide inside than have to say no to someone.
Unfortunately, that has brought quite a lot of trouble into my life.:/
Also, like you, I often cry when I think of all the suffering in the world...and wish I had a magic wand to wave and make it all just go away.
I think I do understand a little about why life appears to be so unequal...I think maybe it is that we each have our own individual lessons to learn in each lifetime...and depending on how well we learn those lessons, and how kind we are to other people...our next life will be easier or harder.
And I do firmly believe that no person is of greater value than another. It makes no difference what job they have...everyone is important.
Dearest Baili, you are such a kind and beautiful Soul...and it is a real privilege to know you.:))
Much Love & Hugs xoxoxo
Dear Baili, the world needs more people like you!
ReplyDeleteJesus, the Son of God, came to serve....the most menial of jobs are sometimes held by the person you least expect to be in such a position. I believe we are placed in the position where we will do the most good for the Kingdom....not of this world, but the Kingdom of God. We needn't be rich to minister to others. We just need a heart like Jesus. It seems like your heart is one that reflects the love and mercy that makes you a woman of worth. You are exactly where you need to be Baili...in the place to love others freely, without condemnation.
ReplyDeleteI don't believe God causes the suffering going on in the world. That is another issue dating back to Adam and Eve. God created a perfect garden...man defiled it, giving in to the temptation of sin....free will.
You are such a blessing to so many, Baili. Keep searching.
Debbie
xo
You are an intelligent and caring person. The world would be better off with more people like yourself.
ReplyDeleteYou are a smart beautiful woman Baili! I'm like you too. I've been hurt by people taking advantage of me too!
ReplyDeleteFor some reason, we all have to go through things, to learn and to heal. I have went through much healing over the past few years and understand, we all have our own journeys and we have to live them.
I do believe we are all the same equally!!
Big Hugs and keep spreading love!
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ReplyDeleteดูหนังà¸à¸à¸™à¹„ลน์
You have always seemed smart to me through your words, my friend, and more importantly - generous in spirit and kind.
ReplyDeleteAmalia
xo
I think you cry because you are kind and feel for others. I don't think that is stupid at all!! Being kind is the best thing anyone can be, I think. I also think you are a very smart woman. Wishing you a happy day.
ReplyDeleteYou choose such interesting topics Baili and clearly are a very informed person and of course intelligent! Your posts always give an indication of your kind nature and that you care for others. It is also lovely that you acknowledge your husband has guided you, no doubt you have done the same for him as, of course, we grow into a couple in marriage and become united in so many ways.
ReplyDeleteHá tantos tipos de inteligência. E é muito importante ter uma inteligência afectiva e prática. E você é uma pessoa cheia de sensibilidade e aquilo que escreve reflecte bem isso mesmo.
ReplyDeleteUma boa semana.
Um beijo.
Dear Baili, please do not out yourself down, because you certainly are not any of those negatives you mentioned in this post. I consider you to be a generous, caring and wise human being. I am glad to read that your husband is so caring and loving and that he is also a wise man.
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful post, baili . . . you are such a kind person. I see things a little differently than some; I believe that there is no meaning or reason for the good and bad that happen, it is merely the way things are in the world. It is human nature and that includes both good and bad. We can, and should, try to live as good people and help those we can help, but we also have to make the best of our own lives without feeling guilt for what we cannot change. This is just my opinion; I don't think one answer is better than another.
ReplyDeleteI think you have received some very good ideas here in the comments!
Hello Every body
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Baili, you are definitely clever and smart! You shouldn't be so hard on yourself! I think you have accomplished many things in your life, not the least of which is raising three fine sons. You can learn a lot about life from spending time with your elders, as you did (and I did). As for crying oceans of tears, I can't think of any girl who hasn't when navigating the teenage years. I still burst into tears, much to the consternation of my husband. I'm just wired that way. It doesn't make me stupid, nor you either.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was a teenager, I had a hard time fitting in, because I couldn't care less about talking about boys, or fashion, or movie stars, or other silly things. It was painful and many kids were mean to me, and it hurt. But I realized that I could never be really happy if I couldn't be me. It took a while, but now I am comfortable in my own skin, and I choose to be around people who accept me for who I am.
I'm learning to be kinder and gentler to my younger self, because I did the best I could at the time, and that's all I could ask of myself. Take care, my friend!