Wednesday, September 29, 2021

The Stuff Of My Life

 A part of our city had little rain last day which has transformed the weather beautifully . It is always good to see trees waving happily while embracing the air .Still humid days are terrible and i hope they are not coming back until next August . We could not have the rain but certain refreshing feeling that follow the rain is delightful ,it's been while to have it .

I could not read much since few days because medicine i am taking for allergy has dimmed my ability to focus and reading without  focus makes me go back to same sentences repeatedly and it also makes me forget what i just read in previous page . 

One and a half week back i realized that slight milia is appearing on my neck back ,i ignored it as usual but after few days it was hard to avoid scratching them . I never got such milia in any summer before so i applied some betnovate cream which we keep in house for cut or injury since years , It sooth for while but i felt it was spreading slowly.  I hate going to doctor but i had to inform hubby and he took me to the doctor immediately. Doctor  gave me ointment and three type of  pills which are keeping me quite dull and i don't like being dull at all :( It's getting better thankfully and this matters most of course .

Two weeks ago we have bought an android device for our smart tv. We were busy in others things so could not explore what it has to offer but eventually load of due doings lightened and we installed apps i mean my younger son did who knows lot about these things . The android device has so many English, hindi  china and Korean channels along with movie apps .So much to see but i feel i am less interested in just watching tv now . This makes me laugh on myself when i remember days when i would literally  cry for hours if i would miss any episode of my favorite show, how embarrassing lol . 

Yet it is nice to have choice so we can watch if we want to . But i must say that abundance of choice is not a healthy thing in life and in any case  because it can confuse us so easily which effects our chances for success negatively  (my opinion). 

My younger son left to repeat Sat test so can improve his previous score . He scored eleven hundred and thirty out of sixteen hundred in his first try but his elder brother wanted him to do better. I hope and pray may he succeed along with all who are trying to do good in their life, amen!

We been through little dramatic situation lately .If you remember i have mentioned one of my post or most probably in my response to some comment  that we had in our mind that once our eldest son is well settled in London city we will help my nephew (my brother's elder son) to go to Saudi Arabia for (loader operator)job. Actually before that i asked to my eldest son if he want to help one of his cousin in making life better for his family .He agreed immediately though he mentioned that as because he is moving to London he has spent all his savings in health insurance so it will take him sometime to settle there and see what he can do . I told him not to worry about time as things are quite closed here and it seems to take few months for opening for air traffic to Saudi Arabia . We were relaxed that we will be able to help my nephew peacefully so far.

But few days back my sister in law called who was angry with us since my brother returned home without much amount of money ,she told that son in law of one of our cousin has offered job to Nomi (name of my nephew ) so they want us to help them in getting all things done including visa and related tests etc and within three days they need to pay for visa. We were totally shocked by this sudden demand .The fear and trauma that i won't be able to help them because my own son is travelling to the London in first week of October and has so many things to do which are not possible without money was eating me . This was embarrassing to ask for financial help when my eldest son was in restricted position i still inevitably called him and told the whole story as it was. I never faced such embarrassing moment in my whole life as he was my own son my own precious baby and i was about to create problem for him . But like always my son surprised me with his calmness and generosity . First of all he calmed me with his healing accent and sweet words and then said that as because situation is tight so he will pay quarter amount  on arriving London and later in three instalments . The amount was equal to his half salary in UK . My heart drowned in mixed feeling of worry for my son and happiness for my nephew .I asked him that he can refuse if it can make things difficult for him but he said it's okay he can survive with little less money and that this is about the honor of his mom. I don't know whether i did good or bad but i know i did this because i wanted to get rid of daily help request from my sister in law. Hubby either does not like supporting people this way as he thinks that it ruins their self respect they get used to easy money . So i had only one solution that i help one of my nephew to have job in middle east country where salaries are little better than Pakistan so he can support his family. I don't care what my sister in law thinks but i think it is my genuine effort to make her family stand on their own feet . Hubby agrees to the idea but he is little annoyed because of wrong timing for the help. He thought we could do this later when our son won't suffer because of  my sympathetic nature.  My son appreciates my habit to help others and he showed with his kind humble behavior how much he respects me. This is most comforting and heartwarming feeling for a mother. Throughout my life i learnt that our actions are paid back to us whether right or wrong . I have absolute faith on words of holy book and science which says that you reap what you sow . 

I believe that this kindness of my son will surly bring him more peace and prosperity in life ahead as no matter what people do to us in return the Divine Creator and Energy within and around us knows all and give us what we deserve eventually !

Thank you for bearing with me dear Friends!

please keep being kind to  all around you so Nature can send back this kindness to you no matter which source she chooses !

Health,Peace and Joy to all of you!

   




 

32 comments:

  1. It is nice to have choices, but I agree 100% too many choices can be a burden. My son barely had 900 on his SAT. His college took him for sports, not scholarship. He was still very successful with his grades and is very successful in his current career, way more than most of his peers who scored well over 1200. I believe schools in the US are moving away from SAT importance.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. i totally agree that too many choices blur our insight and influence our ability to decide precisely dear Joe

      i think Asian students have more burden on their shoulders than students living in developed countries like America ,specially kids who belong to middle class have quite pressure from their environment ,same case is my own son. we want him to be successful at least like his elder brother .not because he has to earn but in my opinion it is because i want him not to rely on anyone including his own brother and prove himself that he can do this too because all he need is motive and little effort as he is blessed with intelligence by the grace of lord already.
      i too think that no test has capacity to proof one's capability of doing well in life as you said your son proved himself lot better who were brighter in studies than him .
      our job is to support kids in moving further in life and after that we can only pray and hope they do good.

      Delete
  2. I understand your desire to help your nephew. Now suddenly you are doing it all. I'm afraid I agree with your husband on this one. Other family member should be pitching in to help too. I know what a loving heart you have and how much you desire to make things easier for others. It breaks my heart that you are unable to help your son move to London yet you are expected to help family members. Your son also has an extraordinary heart. You should be so proud of him for the sacrifices he is willing to make. My love to you and your little family.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Precious Emma your concern honoured me .I am fortunate to have you and others as friend!

      I mentioned why I had to do so in response to Bonnie 's comment still I clear it in next post.
      My love for you too my kind friend!

      Delete
  3. Replies
    1. this is truly a grace of Creator dear Debra

      Delete
  4. You are kind, Baili. I know how your son came to be that way too. Your nephew is a lucky young man. I hope he makes good use of the money!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. i think i inherited from my late mother dear Marie ,i remember once when call came form northern flooded areas and people were donating things they did not use anymore my mother gave her most carefully preserved most expensive and beautiful dress that she wanted to gift her daughter as wedding gift .when i asked her why she said when it comes to donate God want us to give what is most precious thing to us .

      my this nephew is only earning son in the house so like his family i hope too that he will make success out of this

      Delete
  5. I'm glad to hear that your health issues are improving. It is very hard to say 'no' to family, even when it is a bit of a hardship.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. i am getting better dear Kathy

      i think sometimes we are tested by nature so she can see how true and firm we are in our intentions to help people close to us

      Delete
  6. It's stressful when family demand support. There are many options other than begging from relatives.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. dear Red we all deal with so much stress in our life and ignore the fact that how bad it is to do so.

      issue is that things seems burden when we think that problem does not belong to us directly which i feel it does according to the pattern of life.

      i agree that if i see myself in their shoe i know that i will never rely on others or wish if they can help me to be out of critical situation ,i will take it as challenge and try to find way out by having faith on my own mental and physical strength and i am sure i will be able to do it i have not a slight doubt about it. but we know we cannot force others to adopt our way of thinking so what remains behind is a little help we can do to lift them up as way of gratitude for what we are given in life

      Delete
  7. It's important to give not expecting some kind of return, baili.
    I think your son knows that.
    Have a great weekend

    ReplyDelete
  8. I'm glad you saw a doctor and got some medication to help. You and your son are very kind to want to help other family members. I do think it is important to put our immediate family first but that is just my opinion. My fear would be that the more you give money to your sister-in-law and brother then the more they will ask and expect from you. It seems so unfair for you to be under such pressure.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Bonnie thank you for for kind words!

      I never carred what my brother and sister in law wants from me.all I know what I can do to change the situation of their life .

      Actually son of my cousin works in Saudi Arabia since many years. He owns heavy vehicle and supplies construction material. He suddenly needed driver and wanted to sponsor him.i already asked him to think of my nephew if he needs .It was better to deal with him because I can send money to him directly and wait for my nephew pays remaining small part money. In doing so i have chance to have my money back I case my nephew fails to manage. I can keep this money for same purpose until we get other chance like this.if I would not do it now I have to rely on m6 brother 'family who can easily spend money in household which is not my reponsiblty. I want to help them genuinely so they can stand on their own feet .
      My son assured me that he will do fine in less flexible budget and he added that his next salary will be soon in his hand too.

      Delete
  9. Let's hope your allergy soon clears up.
    You are too kind with your relatives...hopefully they will pay your son back.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Margaret

      Actually my son agrees that despite of my nephew succeed to manage rest amount of money and gets this job my brother's family won't be in position to pay such money back.nor we want it back because they already have so much to improve in their own life.

      Delete
  10. This reminds me of a quote. I think Leonard Nimoy said it. Something like this, "The mystery is this, the more we give the more we have." I admire how your family wants to help other family members. Even if it is a difficult time to do so, there is an underlying theme of you not being all alone in the world. It's good to see.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Dear Sandi it makes me cry when I get appreciation from blogging friends for which I have been criticised by many people i know here.

    But honestly when I do such act I feel liberated and closer to my creator!

    I cannot make understand others that how I feel I just know I am helpless before my nature.

    Yes people can call me weird because I think that we all are one family and responsible for each other 's happiness.

    ReplyDelete
  12. It is always good to help family ...

    All the best Jan

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. it is always good to be able to help family i agree dear Jan

      Delete
  13. I was glad to read that you are feeling better, Baili, as I had to look up milia and glad that you husband took you for treatment and that the medications have helped you.It's never good feeling foggy in the head.

    You and your family are so kind to agree to help out other family members. But, it seems that other family members have become too dependent on that help and expect way too much of you and your family. I also agree with your husband that people should help themselves and not look for a handout. You have such a loving and helpful spirit, but sometimes you cannot save everyone . Your son has taken after you in that he too has such a wonderful and helpful heart and I know you are rightfully proud of him. Hopefully, his generosity will not mean too much sacrifice for him later in what he needs to do for his move.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. thank you for kind words dear Kathy !

      i am feeling quite better now except this heavy head which will be fine i hope when my medicines are finished in next two days .

      i am so bored because due to this foggy feeling i am out of raeding blogs since few days :(

      my son is quite careful about everything he does unlike me he plans everything thankfully ,this sacrifice did not put him in trouble except he lost little flexibility in his budget for few days until he gets his salary .this was truly kind of him to help my brother's family who were starving for basic things in life .i did this because i believe that sacrificing luxury to provide some basic needs people close to you pleases God more .

      Delete
  14. Hi Baili! Oh I hope you're off those pills soon. I hate going to doctors and taking medication too. I agree with you about tv. I have lost interest lately in watching things...too much choice makes me bored of it, so I guess that's a good thing because I spend my time doing more productive things! You said you were embarrassed about your reaction to missing your favourite tv shows lol...I can relate...a VERY long time ago I used to watch those daytime soap operas. I remember there was one show, it was a Friday and they were going to reveal a BIG secret....and my power went off, I was so upset, I called the power company and told them I needed to find out what was happening on my show, the poor girl who answered the phone told me she couldn't help me, and I was so upset, ha ha ha...talk about embarrassing! :) :)

    Your son is a wonderful kind soul Baili! ♥

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. because of taking these medicine i feel stuck in kind of bubble balloon dear Rain ,i see everything but hardly understand how bad :(

      being unable to have will for visiting or reading blogs irritates me totally .

      i am waiting for medicines to finish desperately .

      i think most of us go through such phases of life that vary in mindset. in my life it came traumatically when i suddenly loose interest in watching tv all day and started to meditate after death of my parents almost eleven years ago.
      but i remember that watching tv was most easy and available option to escape boredom otherwise i would have left it already in my early thirties because i started to desire for doing something more meaningful but being house wife and being supporting kids in studies gives me only fragments of time even until now so i am still looking for days when i can do what i actually like .

      Delete
  15. all I can say is wow, your son is quite a wonderful guy! you all are so giving in your family.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. dear Sandy sometimes it is really important to squeeze some of your flexibility to deliver others basic needs of their life .
      i think kindness is good but when it is "on time" it can save lives and for me this is way to please my Creator!

      Delete
  16. I am so sorry to hear that you have not been well. I hope you feel better soon.

    Your son does you proud :-)

    I hope he enjoys his new life in London.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Dear Baili, As I read your kind post, one word came to mind: Karma! Baili, lately I have been trying to expand my knowledge and awareness in the spiritual realm. And one thing I think I have learned in this life, for sure: what goes around, comes around. After following your blog for several years I know you are spiritually aware and your kindness is wonderful. Thank you for sharing your family story. God bless you Baili!

    ReplyDelete
  18. Your posts are always full in life and living. Bless you my friend.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Baili, I'm glad you have gotten medication to help with your allergies and hope you feel better soon.

    Your son is a compassionate young man; he sounds a lot like you. It is very kind of both of you to help your nephew; I hope he finds good success at his new job. It is hard to watch family members not fulfill their potential and want continuous help from other people. Your nephew has taken on a big responsibility, bless him.

    ReplyDelete

Protected by Copyscape DMCA Copyright Protection