Honor Killing In My Home Town And Some Heart Sharing

 

Hey  Sweet Hearts 

Hope beating with  gratitude and hope and embracing each moment  as most precious gift :) Needless to say that life is too short for wasting in negative  ways .No matter how advanced we the human become yet easiest way to true happiness and peace is simplicity.The more we are stick to simple pattern of life the better life we can have here :) Talking through personal experience .Complexities may   make us interesting characters who can earn  fame and other  worldly timely pleasures but if our  goal is inner serenity it is impossible to achieve by going through it.Because  all  methods of living that we try by breaking "LAWS  OF NATURE"  leave us shallow and lost .That is what i learnt from my observations and experiences during 50 years of my life.

I  am loving the days of  current season sooo much :) Staying  not wet with sweat all the time is quite an opportunity we get from October to March .April start to warn with slight sweat that summers are approaching near.Despite of this weathers remains magical until lat week of April.May takes it's start with sudden attack of horrible heat that stays with us until September. So present season is reason for keeping me happy all the time .Sun above my neem tree has glorious friendly sweet smile :))) and gentle breeze is having pleasant conversation with my garden inhabitants .Life is beautiful when we are focused on moment we have in hands isn't it :)

Our kitchen wall is being painted since three days and still incomplete. It might have taken two days only if painter would have done it regularly.Actually i liked the color and design of the wall in the house of my youngest brother in law . I mentioned this to hubby so we can have different but same quality of art on our wall. Hubby asked his brother to send same person for the job .Man was busy somewhere else yet he did not mentioned and agreed he that he will do it within two days. Though he could not which annoyed hubby little bit.He asked painter he must come one day and finish it at once and instead doing it during breaks he takes from other job .So let's see if he comes tomorrow after finishing his job somewhere else .

I did not want to talk about murder that took place in my native town until things were clear to me.It is second time that honor killing was being done in my home town.First time it happened when i was in seventh or eighth grade probably. A ruthless  man burnt his wife brutally. It  was  horrible accident that had kept our small village in terror and sorrow for so long.The man who did this to his wife had gone completely mad within months and committed suicide .

This time a brother has shot is younger sister thrice in chest. He said that it did because she was not making him lunch.Though story that neighbors ,relatives tell is different.According to wife of my brother young girl was being sexually abused by her own father who was homosexual too and was inviting boys at home who were friend of his daughter. Story was hard to digest so i went for second opinion  from others specially relatives of the victim. That cleared things and i have to believe that  even such sinful things can happen in my dear home town now.It is heart breaking for me as i grew up there.People were so pure ,honest and innocent.All connected and helpful  to each other including even those who were considered enemies.Murdered girl is the granddaughter of the aunt(sister of father) of my brother's wife.They are second richest family in village now as aunt of my brother's wife has 13 children and nine of them are boys.Her husband was dishonest brother who betrayed his step brother for property and took all what he had in village .The poor brother left village disappointingly .He had down to earth nature and honest nature .He got job as clerk in government  office and spent his whole life in Islamabad with his wife ,three sons and one daughter.Today he is dead though but his family have peaceful living because they have good kids who love and respect each other thoroughly and are model for others that honesty is the best policy in life.Here step brother who robbed him had nine sons but none of them is who can be appreciated or respected for their actions.His daughters are modest and fine ladies though.

Long story short his eldest son who has been snatching lands from people and selling drugs in village is trying to destroy all the young boys in village.Unfortunately he has succeeded to make most of village boys habitual to drugs .His worker boys become friends of good ones and distract them from studies and drag them into mud of misdeed they themselves are doing.It is acknowledged that "we share what we have " so they are trying to poison others as they are themselves.

My brother's son was one of those unfortunate who got trapped in their net.He was not flawless or clean himself either so he became easy target . Son of my boy claims that he was only friend of the boy who was boyfriend of the victim girl .He said that father of the girl told me to rent a house in village so near and invite the boy who wanted to marry his girl.The boyfriend is also grandson of one of my uncle(mom's side).He came all the way from Dubai where he lived with her elder step sister who brought them up like a mother.He came came and stayed at house rented by my brother's son .After just two days they were raided by police .Boyfriend ran away but my nephew was arrested .He is in jail since more than a month. The eldest brother of girl's father is highly criminal mind and he has sued almost every man and many women of the village  for silly reasons .He does so because he has black money and lots of it.

He has accused  my nephew and few other boys that they were threatening the girl's father that if he does not pay them five lac they will upload photos on social media .And he adds that a brother had to kill his sister because boys walking in streets were showing inappropriate photos of her to him .

My nephew says that his friend betrayed him and used his sim card to upload photos .Boyfriend clears that he was invited for modest cause and then they tried to arrest him .He says that they turned girl against him too so he was heart broken and he did so.Despite of his confess my nephew is still inside .His mother and i exchange daily voice messages .I try to clam her down and keep hopeful. We are waiting for further reports that are being charged against girl's father on the basis of  F.I .R written by brother's wife .The biggest restrain is money of brother of victim girls uncle who is don who runs kind of mafia in the area and has contacts that save him from consequences of his illegal actions .I think Nature is doing is justice already as his all children are harvesting what he has sowed for them .Details will be too lengthy so i will only say that the eldest son who is criminal and cruel to people of village is not leading an ideal life in any aspect . Man had numerous accidents,so many fractures and cannot walk straight even.He has involved his sons into his dark business .His girls are also not in good book of village .In short their huge villas are unable to hide their sins.The whole family seems to face embarrassment and infamy because of the actions of boys of this family.

Here  are some photos of my village that will hold special place in my heart for eternity ,i found myself  compelled to share them with you today s recent circumstances there make my heart  heavy yet i feel better when i look at these ,

cor fields where i used to run and play with my cousins girl friends still do not look stranger to me ,part of me still wanders on patios laying within these fields and  recall and observe that little girl running and laughing care freely ,she  still exist within me  becomes dominant  in few lone moments ,i learnt from her how to live life without making your conscience burdened   

 some new paths that modified by  new walkers ,even they seem so close to my heart as land below them is mine too ,no one can change this "is "into was 

Some paths where we ran and played together now witnessed how calmly we can wander on the them with more understandable attitude and different perspective for looking at things on left is wife of my brother ,on right is her step younger sister and in the middle her cousin (sister of victim girl's father)

each time i look at this front yard of my native home my eyes become teary for various reasons ,love for the place ,gratitude that i was able to spent part of my life there and memories about time when i lived here with my parents and sister ,i don't know why those memories  have such power to overcome all the thoughts of present or future ,i am one who lives in a moment but i believe it is possible because i have such beautiful past and in such lovely village !

Progress in the house is slow since my elder brother has broken his leg and fractured his backbone after falling form roof during his construction work as mason almost eight years back ,after six months treatment he was able to stand and walk .he was known for his good work so he still gets some work though not often .Wife of my brother is little difficult person to make understand so my all efforts are invain to convince her that she should let her boys go cities near (Islamabad ,Rawalpindi) therefore boys are often off job and spend time doing nothing,Eldest has truck who earns bread and necessities hardly ,younger  knwos driving and gets once in while job as loader operator ,he is high school passed and could get some private job in office and study further along but due to stubbornness of my brother's wife he has also became lazy and spend time in wander with friends in various areas of country .youngest  goes college but not fondly .my advice falls of deaf ears though i still not give up and this is why i talk to her so may be i can help her  understand things but all she want is easy  help which is not possible for me .i can help her within limits and i do this when i think she really needs it but i cannot do more than this because i don't earn and i can't force hubby to do it regularly ,she has one daughter who has passed tenth grade and quit study 

i am sure no other view in this whole world will make me feel as serene as this one ,the place where i stood and sat for  numerous times and stared at these hills and garden and fields below ,they nurtured my soul and  opened my window of soul (imagination) this where i met him first (Lord) who spoke to me through his creation though my ability to hear and understand this was not at it's best then ! What i feel about this place ,i can write a short book on it :) it somehow completes me !

Precious fellows sorry for long post again. Hope you will be able to read it ,if you can't it's okay ,let me share what you felt about it anyway :) as your opinions are always wellcome and strengthen me!

Signing off for now with lots of prayers and good wishes for you and your world my friends! 

May you find joy within days and peace within mind each moment !

Blessings!

Completion Of Kitchen Renovation !

 Hey  Amazing Hearts 

Hope  enjoying  the weather and moments  in hands with  gratitude and  positivism :)

Our  kitchen  renovation  has been complete finally  and thankfully. I have  shifted  all stuff  into the cabinets including my dinner set that was waiting for it's suitable place .Our old kitchen had only four cabinets that were enough for spice containers or utterly  needed  utensils .But  now my all  things has found their proper place sigh . 

           my new stove ,hubby asked for copper burners so it was quite expensive than others ,as  housewife it is pleasing to have kitchen with new and neat look and stuff  :) so i am liking it a lot :)

here we have lots of sun so this blue color will help to feel the coolness of cloudy sky :) i am even finding these tiles nice now lol

i have bought new bread cooker ,you can see it on left placed with stove ,i am planning to buy some necessary stuff more specially spice or other thing's containers 

the wall above the cabinets  will be painted  that will probably take two and a half days , we will cover everything including cabinets with plastic then 

i washed kitchen stuff last day ,it took two days almost so i am feverish and tired already yet happy and serene with deep sense of gratitude :)

 i know i am posting late but it is because of extra house chores due to renovation but it all is worth it :)

See you soon dear friends ,keep treating yourself with love and kindness as you deserve it :)

I have you all in my thoughts and prayers !

Stay Blessed!

In The Middle Of Kitchen Renovation

We  are enjoying our weather these days to it's fullest. Days are pleasant and nights are slightly cool .Temps are spinning around thirty though figure thirty seems hot during September.For what i am specially grateful for is gentle soothing breeze that feels like miraculous touch of the Love and grace of Lord with each calm gust :) This is inexplicable feeling to feel my Creator as close .This kind touch travels like silver soothing light within me as whole and connects me with him as whole !

Last week two of my sister in law came to stay with us with few of their kids. My younger sister in law brought her daughter (6) and elder one brought her grand daughter .Her grand daughter is considered problem child but i was surprise to see that she did not annoy her grandma for even once .She was extremely calm which was totally different what i know her as during each encounter i found her mom so angry and frustrated about her daughter's behavior .I was concerned but when i saw her as calm it was relief .

This was two days and one night stay.We had nice time together except little difficulty with preparing food for them ,specially my elder sister in law take cautionary meal and i have no kitchen right now .but my back street is serving as kitchen which is hardly 3 feet wide .Yet all went good thankfully as we all face such little difficulties gladly for loved ones .

Half of our kitchen  work seems to be done .I have taken few photos to share with you 

when i got in my front yard i was stunned by beauty and serenity ,being under open endless sky is joy indefinable  :) Sunlight crossing through branches seems always so magical to me ,they take me to the horizons unknown but full of wonder and tranquility .as workers work in the yard from morning 8 am to 6 pm evening ,i stay inside with curtain closed ,so i try to spend sometime in yard before they arrive.Hubby has washed plants many times after cement work has finished but climber look still dusty .we tend to wash it after work is off completely .i like and wait for rain to wash away plants but no rains here since months ,my brother's wife told in her last day's voice message that no rain in their area either though she thinks it is because of an innocent girl has been murdered there.Girl was daughter of one of her aunt and was killed by her own brother for name sake of honor .They blamed few male cousins and other boys who uploaded inappropriate images (photo shopped though)  on social media .My brother's son is one of those boys .Though he declines to do so and insists that his sim card was used by another boy and he is not guilty 

 

I took this photo before squirrels spoil them ,earlier i was worried about pomegranate but now i am happy for squirrels :)

tiles below cabinets are not that i wanted ,i wanted tiles with green color (fresh grass color) but found nowhere including Sukkur city which has huge shops and collection,all they was brown and cream color ,i like cream color but they had weird patterns and big images of fruits or crockery that hubby did not like ,he preferred these and i greed inevitably ,Blue sheet of cabinet will be hidden behind grey doors that i chose , you can see it in last image but it's elegance is not obvious in photo completely   

my most favorite place on earth is my yard :) the peace i feel here and joy is hard to explain . I am deeply grateful for this sense of realization that how close Lord is to his man and all he needs a true call from him so he can response with kindness and eternal love ! I don't know what is after life but i am totally drowned with gratitude that he made me "FEEL" him ,It seems that the door beside which i was waiting for ages has started to open slightly ,the strange comfort  and contentment that i used to feel as child even ,still overwhelms me when i look at these gifts ! I did my stretching and little yoga while inhaling his grace and exhaling all the worldly worries for while ,This gives positive start to my day 

Dear friends hope and pray that each day is adding glory, peace  wisdom to your soul and each day life is more  graceful is for you.You are in my thoughts and prayers as precious fellows .Wishing all of you more grace of Creator in days ahead !

see you soon!

Deadly Peace And Whirlpool Of Energies

 

Sitting in the living room on my dining table  i am looking through the window at my neem tree  and small garden that seems to place under the shade of my neem tree .This is soothing sight which makes me grateful for the blessings and peace i have in my life .

Sometimes  i find myself  weird .I feel myself drowned in the ocean of stillness .Like i have become stuck in whirlpool of deadly peace .It is disconnecting me all other bothering feelings inevitably.That makes me feel doubtful about myself. Am i sick to be at extreme peace ? 

Should i feel guilty to find such peace within world full of desperation ?

Or i have earn it with constant fight with odds of life and negativity ?

Still guilt does not disappear completely but dims to some extent .

And i am again within whirlpool of stillness .Though query keeps poking my mind ,from where it has come ,this deadly peace ?

Is this worldly stuff or kindness i receive from loved ones ?

Or The" Zero " that always fascinates me with it's nothingness that  gives birth  to all existing .

Why zero  is most attractive number to me ?

Why nothingness has so much appeal ?

Is this world of  possibilities springing within zero or "nothingness" that keeps me as deeply " still" from within  ?

All  i know (now) that it was there within me  from beginning but extended by the time and overcame eventually on my remained being belonged to vibrant part of  life.Vibrant with dreams and wishes .

I was crystal clear in my longings regarding probable life i had ahead  as  growing girl then.

Having so less compare to others never bothered me personally . I was content with my carefree attitude .I felt strange fulfillment in the middle of emptiness even. 

When i was able to think more clearly in my thirties i felt that desire to feel "close to him"(Lord) grew stronger.

I wanted nothing for myself  even then. There was constant weird fear of loosing my most precious feeling of "having him with me " if i wanted world . This desire to "feel close to him " was not self creation .It came along my genes .I inherited it ,from whom i can't say.

This feeling of being close to Him resemble feeling of  student who wants to be appreciated by class teacher who he likes so much and  adore her effort she put  for making him  learn stuff for being good human being. 

Feeling of "having him" with me felt most comforting when i had less matter or people around. He spoke to me through everything i encountered in life .Nature ,people ,events ,accidents ,incidents and coincident .Each of these thing supported my strength for having faith in Him eventually. Still i know if there was chance for me to get lost in all the nature in world and spend time while feeling strongly connected to him i would have done this .

When i once shared this with hubby he said " it is easy to quit world and stay with him alone  but Hard to get in the mess of world and still stay connected to him and  live with rules he has set for you as your guardian. This is true test of love  that you have for him because temptations of this world are irresistibly compelling  and  suffering  that life bring on you are determined to shake  your faith .But without test there is no proof that you loved him truly .

I  had to live life of person who is tangled in so many threads that  life throw at us as a net to distract  us ,captivate us and take us away from him so can  illusion  and separate  us from our actual divine aim of life,

 "Observe" "Learn " ".Love "Live " and "Help Others to Live Better  if can "

Still i could never discard myself from that feeling that i am tiny part of His eternal  energy ,existing within Him ,By Him and pulling towards Him gradually until day i will dissolve in Him once again until He gives me another journey in another shape .So i try Hard to please him by all i can do while living worldly life.

Sometimes when i look at sky i feel that  we all are existing within the ocean that is filled with tow kind of energies evidently. 

Positive energy and Negative energy .We are left to float among them freely .Our intentions and our tendencies  determine  our directions which kind of  row we will join. 

Among  the rows  of both energies there are places where water of ocean is more thick or thin .And there are whirlpool  that wait for voyagers  who rush into them blindly .They don't  are not meant to let go what  is trapped within them.People trapped in them experience  extreme  pressure of energy whether it is dark or positive .

Those who sail in thick or thin waters  live healthy life probably .They don't have to fight with any kind of pressure so they are more relaxed .

People swimming near  where whirlpools of  energies exist  have to resist to prevent themselves from falling in.It is not bad to be trapped within whirlpool of positive energy though balance is always appreciated most by learning that laws of nature offer .

Though  how dangerous is to get trapped into the whirlpool of negative energy we all know this. What  is the shape of our world today it is  obvious that most of us  are trapped within whirlpool of negative energy otherwise world would have better face .

I am believer of faith and hope so i hope that not may be all but more people will understand this and will try to avoid this trap .

Planet earth will not be heaven then though but better place where  more hands will be available to hold who can fall rather than push to make  other fall .

I am sorry if i bored you with my long post today but being honest on my online diary page is must for me .And today words were out of my control .

Actually  i wanted to reply to your kind beautiful comments today but slipped away when started to type .

Each of you have left really nice words regarding my renovation and behavior of the wife of my brother.I want to say THANK YOU all of you specially  Sue from This and That said beautiful words about true happiness that touched my soul so deep :)

Thank sweet friends how can i repay this kindness and love of your's that becomes backbone of my confidence !

All i can do is to keep you all in my thoughts and prayers and visit your lovely places to sooth my heart.

God Bless You All!