A Journey To Nowhere poem by me

 When she awoke was completely in the dark 

Without any clue of light    and spark 

She  didn’t know what was that place 

And she didn’t know what she was 

Could be a desert or could be a room 

Loveliness , suffocating and gloom 

All she could hear ,her own breath 

But she did not know life or death 

She was certain   of that she is !

Though rest of everything was a mist

Wondering in awe and uncertainty 

Maybe that’s it ,till eternity 

She waited with urge to see

What she was and what could be 

Then with the help of hurts and lack 

Time created in the wall some cracks 

Her first introduction to the  light 

She realized that she had a sight !

Nurtured by her curiosity to know 

Her realization irresistibly  grow

It took ages but she broke all walls 

 First everything looked pretty overall 

Despite of the  ups and downs 

Worth wearing was life ‘s crown 

This  feeling gave her sense of liberation 

Her tools were compassion and imagination 

She thought she was good as nurse 

So why life will give her any curse 

She didn’t know that life is game like test

She challenges no matter how best 

Every moment and every day 

For what you get you have to pay

To save herself from any harm 

She  thought place of high and calm

She created her nest so high 

So she can avoid the sorrow near by

But she forgot when see from top 

Whole reality is in your grasp!

Peacefully sipping a cup of tea 

Seems impossible when you see 

People below are in so much pain 

This makes peace of  one’s soul drain !

It’s not only world outside 

Same thing  true world  inside 

Have you pondered on your thoughts as whole?

Pulling us in  numerous black holes 

Falling in can be risky or fun 

If you have a “ self control “ none 

Once she got this game as whole 

Rest was spent in how to “ hold”

But  it wasn’t just black hole’s pull 

Everything around appeared like insane bull

A comment, a gesture, a smile or look 

Can push her in a darkened brook

It could be fixed with meditation 

Confronted with next examination 

She could sense another intrude 

This time it was her own “food “

Though she was tired of constant struggle 

Thought it might be  last to tackle 

She  kept check on what she eat 

This  made her feel good at least 

All she did for one  true feeling 

Which seemed  only thing  as Healing!

In this world of full of choices 

She chose  “Faith “ to rejoice!

Faith in someone so Supreme 

Who created everything from his Gleam 

She doesn’t not understand His ways 

All  she knows  Above He stays 

This  liberates  her from the dope 

She can believe in “try” Pry “ and Hope!

Heart Talk

 Hey kind people 🥰

Hope spreading your light around you blissfully 🤗♥️

I am sorry if I am falling  behind in my posts. As I said the current situation in my homeland had made everyone feel sad ! The videos and photos say that people who lost their homes , animals and belongings will suffer for long to reach the point where they can feel normal or settled again. These days I felt strong urge if there was some NGO in our city who would want to help victims,I would have been very happy to gather some help with others to send to them! But I don’t  think if such a thing exists here.  If one are two city has they operate school systems for primary classes only.There are other two reasons to delay my guests and a mental trauma I went through because of an email from google. My eldest sister in law (hubby’s sister) came to stay for two days and one night. She comes after some months so we had some nice light chat and I tried to serve her good meals. She was in her teens when she had been married to a village farmer. He was tough man to live with because of his very dominant attitude and quarrelsome nature.  She was widowed one year back. But her test stays with her as she has a mentality disabled son. He is in mid twenties but depends on his mother for all physical care. I feel happy when she manages to take break and comes for one or two days. A little time to breathe and relax 🥹 Good thing is that she likes to watch old indian and Pakistani movies. And we have fifty inches tv which becomes a good source for her to enjoy 🤗 This makes me happy when look at her sitting leisurely without worrying about anything 🥰

She left today and I am writing this post after taking a twenty minute nap 😅

Second reason is horrible (for me at least) , I don’t know if I mentioned before that being a housewife I hardly keep check on my email. When I opened it few days back there was an email from google of August saying that “ your google photos and gmail account will be deleted  in 11 days ,  manage your account and delete videos and photos or get more space by paying “  with thought of deleting videos and photos I felt terrible and ran to email box to delete extra unwanted content. But was shocked to see that despite google told me same thing I knew already my inbox page is not showing button of “select all” which made me feel miserable. Anyway I went to manage box shown in the email and deleted the videos 😭😭😭😭😭😢 worst part that today it was written again on my gmail page that 80% storage is full. I opened inbox and started to delete messages one by one 😞😥

Dear friends if you know what to do please share ! I forgot to take picture of the email I received sadly. I am unable to unsubscribe sites I have joined long long ago because they ask sign in and password which is another issue because I don’t remember the password I used long time ago ☹️

At the end of this post I am sharing two disturbing photos of my recent shingles disease. It’s before and after pic .you can avoid if want to. I am sharing only if anyone felt curious how it looked.

Before

                                                                   

Thank you so much for being with me precious friends 🥰🙏

God bless you all 🙏♥️

Health,peace and happiness to you and to all you love 🥰♥️🙏

Floods And Gabi The Script Supervisor ♥️

Hello Beautiful Hearts🥰 

Hope  beating with hope and faith despite all the ups and downs life brings ! 

I am little late for my weekly post sorry!  It’s just situation caused by cruel weather conditions has made me feel low these days. Hundred and thousands of people have been shifted to shelters because their villages and towns are almost drowned. More rains have been predicted. All the rivers are overflowing and water is entering in area near by in miles unfortunately. Some parts of the cities are included as well . The floods have been declared worst in the history after 1954. Our river Indus is supposed to get maximum water on 6th September,around 9 to 10 lac cusec . We live 29km away from sukkur where Indus River passes by. We haven’t received any warning yet but there seems intensity in the environment. All we the people can do is wait and hope for things will not go to extreme 🙏☹️

I couldn’t think of anything better than beautiful pictures dear Sue shared last week. Actually I have thought that I will write about it on 7th of the October On Gabi’s birthday 🤗 but to lighten up the gravity of this post I am going to share it today.Hope you will enjoy 🥰

My eldest Ashen and Gabi at night of the screening 

Gabi’s parents Sue and John and my son attended the screening party of the short film made by Gabi that has entered in few festivals. GabiGabrielWood is working in film industry as script supervisor since she was eighteen. Sue told and my son Ahsan as well that it’s pretty tough and demanding job because She has to be very careful about the continuity of the project. Isn’t it quite inspiring 🤗🥰👍

Sue took shot when Ahsan was recording Gabi talking to a director on stage. I am already feeling feeling very much inspired by Sue and John and how wonderfully they carry their life . Gabi indeed inherited this amazing talent to grow and groom  from her parents 😊👌♥️ I truly feel proud of her 🥹🥰♥️  she will be busy in creation of her new project in this month which is next season of Horrible Histories! 

 

Heartfelt thank you to all for being with me dear friends and leaving such heartwarming comments on my precious post🙏

You guys are so generous and amazing 🥹🙏🥰♥️

I feel blessed to have you all by my side 🥹🙏

Sending heartfelt best wishes,lots of love and prayers 🙏♥️♥️♥️

Stay Safe ,Stay Healthy 🙏♥️

Grateful For The Recovery , Art By Younger Son, Musical Library And Independence Day In Native Home

Hey Amazing hearts🥰♥️

Hope beating smoothly on the rhythm of life despite odds ♥️👍

Heartfelt thanks to each of you for sending your good wishes and healing thoughts to me on previous  my post🥹🙏♥️

Your words are my strength and I believe it was God’s grace, hubby’s much care and your prayers that helped me to heal in no time 🥹🥹🥹

Yes my shingles healed within a week thank goodness and I am on my feet again since three days with utter grace of God🥹🙏

Dear friend Sue said maybe I took some stress which led to that remnant of chickenpox bacteria reactivate . I contemplated over this for a while but couldn’t figure out what stress I might have taken . When I was writing her that I don’t think I was taking any stress these days my mind suddenly shook up with thought of extreme heat and humidity we have been suffering from. And my response to her question turned negative . Yes a struggle to move through extremely hot days are stressful undoubtedly 😞 Our body feels this stress unknowingly which results in such severe symptoms sometimes . Later we knew that not just our city but my native part is facing this problem and many people are having shingles unfortunately. I just hope that we can find vaccination for this painful disease here like other countries but seeing the signs I don’t think it’s going to happen any sooner ☹️

Anyway,after recovering I visited my mother in law which I have postponed last Friday due to tiredness. Then there was a small family gathering for fixing the marriage proposal between one of our nieces and nephews. Both are first cousins and in early twenties. Wedding will be determined later because mother of the bride isn’t well and having treatment for Asthma.

I want to thank Sue who kept texting me during my illness. It surly made pleasant affect on my mental health meanwhile,specially when I wasn’t able to walk at all. She is sweet and such an inspiration 🥰♥️

Hubby was great support too who didn’t leave my side even for a while . Even he was looking after household,cooking particularly and supervising youngest son for few necessary pieces of jobs as well, he attended my shingles twice to thrice a day so healing can be achieved quickly. And it worked miraculously 🥹🙏

I am grateful for having my mobility back and I will try to keep it slow so heat doesn’t act on physical weakness as severely.

Destruction brought by climate change has damaged national economy hugely and badly unfortunately and watching how much damage has been caused one can assume that reconstruction will take longer time and more money to recover from such traumatic conditions 😞😔☹️

 It is assumed that after every seventy years when our planet changes its pools such severity of situation is witnessed. I wonder how much time it will take weather  to settle down and behave normal again? 

No matter how far we have come in modern technology and advancement on various levels , when it comes to face Nature’s fury we seem like a string in the ocean 😔

Sharing  art created by younger son from Karachi. All educational academies and offices were closed in order to solve issues of rainwater that has turned the city in big pond . Thankfully things are getting better quickly after monsoon spell is gone 🙏 Younger son also shared few pics of an interesting place he had visited with friends. It’s quite a big musical library which was owned by someone who had great fondness for Urdu music. I wish my son could have tell me name of the owner. But for some reason he couldn’t learn it.  

 

Centaurs Mall Islamabad,  we don’t eat out most of the time but luckily youngest son found a deal in which plate for one person included spinach along with chicken,we had only spinach dish with bread which was so delicious and later harmless as well thankfully 🤗

     The big round pot in our front yard provides some very delightful treats for eyes and soul always 🥰♥️

Younger son created this on his sketch book first and then  on his tablet, characters are from the game he had created online for community in which he initiated the story and other participants adds layers to his story twice a week I think. He said he is enjoying how people share their ideas and story plant getting taller slowly. Reminds me that maybe such ideas existed in past as well but right now I can’t remember where I could locate it.

Pakistan has rich history of art and literature. I was fortunate to witness some good peaceful years before internet and social media turned things into rapid and artificial thinking which exists on surfaces and fears to getting into depth. Reading books, listening music, being creative with innate gifts was normal because people’s had time to slow down and contemplate. It’s often said that why great people or ideas aren’t being produced anymore. I think because we got to busy with escapism and stay busy in entertaining our surface thoughts only . Term use it or loose it frightens me when I think of consequences of it 😔☹️

These glimpses made my eyes teary at first because brought lots of memories back when I would listen music most of the day on radio while growing up 🥹

   I am sure many of you are familiar with this gramophone machine, my parents though did not have it I guess but they mentioned listening music on gramophone,maybe they had it before I was born ♥️ I think it’s pretty modern version of that old one.

     My brother’s daughter celebrated 14 August Independence Day with her cousins and shared few glimpse of how they all dressed up for the occasion 🤗 .me and my sister and our dear mom would celebrate our Independence Day with patriotic enthusiasm when we were in school 🥹♥️🥰

Thank you for being with me precious friends,hope you found my simple post interesting ☺️

You all are in my thoughts and prayers always sweet people,please stay positive and grateful for gifts you have and keep spreading your light among all around you 🥹🥰♥️

Health,peace and happiness to you all and to all you love ♥️🙏

Peripheral Neuropathy ,Sudden Blisters And Glimpses Of Recent Trip To Islamabad

 

Hey Sweet Hearts 🥰

Hope all are creating best of what you have at the moment with faith and strength of undefeated Hope 🥰

I pay thanks for everyday I am given , every blessing I have because I believe that including my life everything is a gift 🙏

Four days ago when I went to sleep while reciting some comforting holy verses I had no idea that next day when I will wake up I won’t be able to walk. No not some worst thing happened thankfully 😅 

When I tried to walk I felt that sole of my left foot was aching. I walked on my right foot for chair . When I observed I saw few dim , pinkish spots appeared on sole. I felt something was wrong with place above my left heel as well.There were also few blisters like burns. Any we went to the skin doctor immediately who gave some medicine. After taking the medication I  got cold fever at night. Hubby gave me common fever tablets as additional medicine but fever returned after three hours. Hubby guessed that may blisters were not the skin issue at all so he took me to the physician who examined carefully and gave some medication. Today when fever was on hold I checked online about such infections and one phrase  Peripheral Neuropathy  led to read further  about Posterpetic Nuralgia and  then Shingles . Reading about Shingles revealed that almost half population of the world is infected with this disease. We all get through chickenpox in childhood mostly. According to this article virus stays in your body rest of your life after recovering and reactivate in people with weak immune systems years later causing Shingles. Good thing that disease can be vaccinated two doses Shingrix or Zoster which is not available in our country though ☹️ 

I am feeling better today and I hope I will be able to walk in some days.

Today after going through some tough days talking to eldest son on video call was really healing experience 🥹🙏🥰

Now some brighter moments to share that are keeping me happy with their joyful memories ☺️

         Fatima Jinnah Park Islamabad where we walked few times ,this stunning baradari behind us invites visitors to snap some shots and provide shelter in sudden downpour 

                                  After walk visitors sit to dry relax and enjoy the lush scenery 

Shakarpariyan Monument  Park is divided two beautiful parts,  both part give fair and panoramic view of the capital city ,monument standing tall behind reflects unity and diversity of  provinces 

     

An elegant framework of walls surrounding this part of the park provides visitors a sitting place to view the park gardens below and city roads glowing at night 

Many youngsters were sitting by crossing the legs outwardly ,but when I turned and saw mine doing so I asked him to turn his legs inward immediately 

    A pleasing walk in Fatima Jinnah park , I absolutely loved seeing sunset there  ,two old men walking by added more meaning and beauty to my click !

                     Rawal lake view park entrance road provides a one kilometre walk to the park 

 Pleasant weather adds strength and richness to the memories ,I will remember that gorgeous day for long I am sure 

U

I bought these two lovely paintings from dollar store Islamabad, green theeme attracts me always and concept is fascinating as well 

Thank you for being with me friends 🥰  and heartfelt thanks for your warm support always 🙏♥️ your kindness is my strength 🥰

Sending you much love and prayers ♥️🙏♥️

Stay grateful 🙏🥰♥️♥️♥️

Pretty Cups , Books , Hadrian Wall And Happy Birthday !

 

Hello Beautiful People 🥰

Hope all of you are finding goodness in life whether through big happiness or little joys 🙏

It took us or only me probably to settle mentally here but now it feels I am actually back for which I am grateful!  Though time passed in that wonderful apartment has turned into sweet memories finally instead longing to go back 😅 Thanks to my precious eldest son who gifted us those amazing moments for two beautiful months 🥰

This time we visited flea markets few times due to heat first week and then excessive rains for a week later. I noticed that in three years prices of second hand things have tripled or even more sadly . It certainly affects the buyer’s capacity to purchase things of liking on reasonable prices. Honestly flea markets don’t seem for people belong to middle class anymore. I used to see foreigners occasionally in such markets buying show pieces particularly. But I realised they just asked and left the shop when couldn’t bargain with shopkeeper. I bought few cups as cups are my favourite thing to collect because they are often broken by youngest son when he washes dishes sometimes. I was happily surprised to find few cups that attracted me because of their lovely appearance. Sharing below photos I took for this post. I am curious if some of you also like to collect cups of tea mugs during trips to different areas ?  I also bought books but this time only two books. I thought if we will be staying in Islamabad for extended periods I will try to locate some library nearby . Below I have shared a wonderful photo shared by Dear Friend Sue from Scotland. Sue and John are visiting Scotland with her truly amazing sister and her husband who live in Canada. Sue’s sister has cancer which was really a heartbreaking news ! But she instead staying at home and grieving decided to take trips to different European countries ,isn’t it very inspiring dear friends 🥹🥰 I really appreciate such level of strength and wisdom 🤗🥰♥️🙏  As I often say things we can’t control don’t worth wasting time on. So we should embrace the every moment of life gratefully because it’s gift just for once only 🤗♥️

The last photo is of my precious baby, my eldest son who’s birthday is today 🥰🙏♥️  Happy Birthday to my precious Son 🙏♥️Hope you will enjoy my simple joys♥️🙏

Sorry I couldn’t straighten out this photo, first book is written by British author Robert Lomas , I found it’s introductory lines appealing.hope it will be interesting to read. Second book is written by Turkish writer Elif Shafak ,I have read two books and I really enjoyed them .it’s fiction and I feel it also won’t disappoint me.

      These pretty bowls cost  5. 28 dollars that are 1500 rupees here ,so expensive,I had bought plates of such quality in less than half price three years back :(

Each cup cost 200 rupees Pakistani and I didn’t turned them in dollars so you just make a guess please 

               My most favourite one with lush green and flowers and cute rabbit 🤗🥰♥️

                                                        Opposite side of same cup above ♥️

                                                     Both sides of the same cup this and below 

                                                  I love stories and this cups tells one 🤗♥️

                          

                   I loved how the theme of this cup describes grandmother,I wish I could gift it to mine 

      These two  hanging plates cost 1000 and I bet if it wasn’t hubby the shopkeeper would have given me on double as he started first. I could never learn how to bargain. Hubby says I am on the other side instead of his.this sounds serious accusation ☹️

          I love paintings that display village life and this is the only reason I insisted to buy them,I know I can never afford to buy actual paintings in my life. The simplicity is the real beauty and we lost it sadly!

       Sue and her dear sister climbed the toughest and highest part of Hadrian’s wall in Scotland and this is so sweet of her to send me the picture because last time I have commented on her  video  that she seemed little breathless . So she shared this wonderful photo of their accomplishment 🥰👍 

L

Today it’s 32nd birthday of our eldest son 🥹♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️🙏. Our hearts can’t stop praying for him as he has such a soft and kind soul which touches every heart he encounters I am sure 🥹🥰♥️🙏

Heartfelt thanks for being with me dear friends 🥰🙏

May each day bring you peace, happiness and health by the grace of God!🥰🙏♥️

Back To Our Home

Hello precious Friends 🥰

Hope everyone is having blessed,beautiful days by the grace of God🥰🙏

We are back home after spending almost two awesome months in our bnb rental ( thanks to our eldest son and God who gave him capacity and wisdom to do so)  Time flew by so quickly as they say good times seem shorter. Best thing was existing without feeling constant heat pressure and sweating 🥵 And for it we felt thankful everyday 😍🙏 When it started to rain in first week of our arrival we were overjoyed 🥹But it was heartbreaking to keep receiving sad news from different parts of the country then . Heavy rains seemed unusual though but land-sliding and flooding caused serious damage to the property and many people,specially tourists who were visiting the upper northern part.  Such incidents made it hard to focus on bright side. Hubby would tune in the news channel after finishing exercise and I would prepare breakfast. The horrible news would make my heart heavy. Everyday The last line of the news would be that hundreds of people died in Palestine because of attacks and hunger. It would make it painful to eat afterwards honestly!  Then one day I suggested hubby if he can switch new time ,and he agreed. News about floods and earthquakes in various parts of the world keeps me sad and I know I can’t do anything to correct them. But I can help those around me who suffer from any such tragedy or pray to the God for whole humanity! And I never stop it🥹🙏

We arrived here yesterday morning (11 am almost) . I was terrified already with assumptions of possible heat we could face but continuous rain in different areas has deduced the heat here as well thankfully!  

Loads of cleaning were waiting for us which we did until the evening. We were utterly exhausted and fainting during dinner so went to bed early. Today is cloudy but still hot . But I. Know I will be used to it within week because I am spent 33 years here. Hubby said once paper work of retirement is over we can stay in Islamabad for all six extremely hot months. To be honest,we have skipped the idea of buying house in Islamabad because of very high inflation rise we have seen in last four years. It was highest jump ever I believe. 

Sharing below some shots taken during trip to two different 

places . Hope you will enjoy the glimpse.

       One of the best things was I could meet my sister, I asked her if she can accompany me to the graveyard as I wanted to visit my father ‘s grave like every second year we come. She agreed and we could spend some nice sisters time together by the grace of God 🙏  it was a lovely meeting which gave us opportunity to exchange our thoughts on matters of common interest like family,relationships and children particularly.

     This one was captured by youngest son in Fatima Jinnah Park,a largest family walking (750 acres ) lush ,serene and very beautifully maintained.  It was 15 minutes drive away from us yet we visited there few times because of its lovely environment. We finished our walk and sat down to enjoy the beauty of surroundings ,then I asked my son to take a photo so I can share it in post and revisit the moment sometime ☺️ park hardly remains empty but morning and evening are pretty crowded.

I took this picture during our visit to Rawalpindi Lake View Point Park , it was very cloudy day actually but we decided to take the risk of being drenched in the case of rain.  When we arrived the  rain started but it was very thin and periodic and stayed that way during whole day. Visitors seemed happier with lovely weather.  An unknown small local band was singing songs on microphone with original background music which was played on record ( I didn’t know it could be done that way actually) many people were surrounding the band ,few were coming ,staying and cheering then leaving. Some were appreciated with money including us. 

   Music has filled the place with spiritual elegance and emotional depth which turned every scene in something more profound and meaningful!

                                             Dams are full  after the one week rain 

       I noticed an English woman  passed by with her Pakistani husband but we were returning hurriedly so couldn’t take the photo.

 

   Combination of breeze in slight rain was so great to feel good 🤗♥️

Thanks for being with me dear friends!

I wanted a write more but time is up . I have to say prayer and then make green tea . I bet you too pray for yourself and for all we all love dear friends! God is always around and within. Everything we have is his gift . So thanking Him is must ! And praying for us and for all is needed. He can guide us to do better in life and spread love instead hate! 

Thinking of you all dear friends 🤗🥰🙏♥️

Sending much love and best wishes to all Amen 🥰🙏